The big post about baking (for Monkey)

So I asked a couple of weeks ago for suggestions on food-related topics. Monkey wanted a post about Baking 101. So, with the help of the internets and the Joy of Cooking, I am here to dispel the myths and impart the wisdom I've gained in baking for the last, oh, 23 years.

Cookies

There are so many different kinds of cookies (drop, rolled/shaped, bar, etc.) that it's difficult to write something about cookies in general, but I will do my best. Cookies are usually made with shortening (butter, margarine, etc.), sugar, eggs, the dry ingredients (flour, baking soda/powder, salt), and other stuff to make them taste good (chocolate, chocolate chips, vanilla, oatmeal, raisins, dried cranberries, nuts, etc.) Cookies bake differently depending on the type (on a cookie sheet as individual items vs. cooked in a pan for bar-type), but usually take somewhere between 5-10 minutes per batch. The oven is preheated and cookies are usually baked on a greased cookie sheet (though some varieties don't require greasing, like Mexican Wedding Cookies). When the cookies are done, it's usually a good idea to remove them from the sheet or pan (to help prevent overcooking), unless you're baking a bar cookie recipe that requires a second step, like the addition of melted chocolate and nuts over a plain bar cookie, or adding the lemon part to a lemon bar.

If you're making shaped/rolled cookies, it's usually a good idea to chill the dough before rolling/shaping to make it easier to work with. If you're making drop cookies, there's usually no need (unless the dough is really sticky). Bar cookies tend to have thicker dough and are pressed by hand into a pan before baking.

I've never really tried to make lower-fat cookies, though sometimes I use more oatmeal and less white flour if I'm making a cookie recipe with oatmeal. The few experiments I've done with substituting whole wheat flour for white haven't turned out tasting especially good, so I figure if I'm going to be eating cookies they might as well be yummy. Also, I tend to use a mixture of white and brown sugar or just brown regardless of the type of sugar called for in a recipe (unless it's a recipe where the color of the final cookie needs to be really light) - I find brown sugar makes cookies more flavorful and more chewy. I almost always use unsalted butter to make cookies and have had better luck with melted baker's chocolate than cocoa powder when making chocolate cookies. To melt baker's chocolate, use a double boiler or melt it in a saucepan over another saucepan that has hot water in it, and add a little bit of shortening to help it melt evenly. Heat until melted but do not overheat.

Process of cookie making: Cream together sugar and shortening/butter in a large bowl. (I always do this by hand) Add eggs and flavoring (vanilla, almond extract, etc.). Add melted chocolate if you are using it. Use a pastry blender to sift dry ingredients together in a smaller bowl, then add to wet ingredients slowly until mixed in. Add mix-ins (chocolate chips, oatmeal, dried cranberries, raisins (I never use raisins in cookies, I hate the way baked raisins taste), nuts, etc.). I also tend to add spices like cinnamon or allspice, depending on the recipe.

I think if you are not used to the process of making cookies, you should follow the recipe until you get more comfortable with the process and can make substitutions or additions. I've been making cookies for a really long time so I usually feel comfortable doing this.

Pies/crisps

I wrote about pie crust here, but the other awesome thing to do with fruit to turn it into a dessert is to make a crisp/crumble/buckle/brown betty etc. Fruit crisp is super easy and far more healthy than baking the same fruit inside a pastry shell. For a basic crisp, you need brown sugar, some butter (a few tablespoons), some oatmeal, some spices (cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, cloves, ginger, whatever), and a little bit of flour. I always eyeball the proportions and mix the butter into the other ingredients with my hands so I know it's well-mixed. Prepare fruit (chop into pieces, peel, etc., whatever you need to do to prep it) and add a little bit of sugar to the fruit unless it's really sweet. If it's super-sweet, you can add lemon juice to it. Put it in a pie pan or an 8x8 baking dish and sprinkle the crisp topping, then pop it in the oven (at 350 or so) until it smells done and the juices are running out of the fruit.

Muffins/quickbreads

According to Joy of Cooking, muffins and quickbreads are the same thing, just cooked in differently-shaped pans (so essentially, any quickbread recipe can be used to make muffins and vice versa). Quickbreads are so named because they are cooked with baking powder and soda rather than yeast, so they take far less time to bake. I don't bake a lot of muffins from scratch but I have made quite a few quickbreads over the years (favorites include: a family recipe for cranberry orange bread which I have modified at times to be pomegranate orange bread, zucchini bread, corn bread, and pumpkin-chocolate chip bread).

The basic process for a muffin or quickbread is to combine the wet ingredients very well (eggs, butter/oil, honey/brown sugar, the main liquid (milk, yogurt, sour cream, fruit juice, etc.), and combine the dry ingredients very well with a pastry blender or whisk to get them kind of fluffed up (flour, salt, baking powder and/or soda), then gently fold the dry into the wet until just moistened and immediately pour into greased/papered muffin tins or loaf pan. As with pie crust, the more you mix, the tougher it will be. Use a butter knife or toothpick in the center of the loaf to check for doneness; muffins are usually done when they've risen a bit and the tops are starting to brown.

And now, for Monkey's questions. She asked:

"Specifically-what's the difference btween regular unsweetened cocoa powder and dutch processed? Do I need to use baking powder AND baking soda in a muffin recipe? What's the difference between cake flour, regular all purpose and whole wheat? I cook my regular muffins with whole wheat and I'm happy enough with that but I'm curious as to the differences. "

Cocoa powder: According to wikipedia, cocoa powder comes in two varieties: regular or natural (the kind you usually see in a store) is more reddish than the traditional "chocolate" color, and relatively low in pH, which can cause a bitter/acidic taste; and Dutch processed, which has been treated to neutralize some of the acidity and so is milder in taste and more chocolate-colored. The cocoa powder I use at home is a Dutch processed special dark flavor made by Hersheys, though I like regular cocoa powder for some things as well.

Baking powder/soda (info from Joy of Cooking):

Baking soda is used when there is enough acid in a recipe to neutralize the alkaline in the soda, which causes the release of carbon dioxide (this process is called chemical leavening). The carbon dioxide pushes against the batter, which causes it to expand while it bakes. A recipe needs enough acid to cause the reaction to happen - soured milk of some sort (yogurt, sour cream, etc.), molasses, chocolate, honey, citrus juice. If there isnt enough acid, you have to use a combination of baking soda and baking powder. When using baking soda in a recipe, the carbon dioxide reaction starts almost immediately so you have to bake the batter asap or it won't rise enough in the oven.

Baking powder is a combination of baking soda and a liquid- and heat-responsive acid salt like cream of tartar. You can make your own baking powder at home by combining 1/4 tsp baking soda, 1/2 tsp cream of tartar, and 1/4 tsp cornstarch (this makes 1 tsp single-acting baking powder). Most baking powder sold in stores is double-acting, meaning it has an acid that doesn't react until the batter reaches a certain temperature (usually 140 F), which causes additional rise during the later stages of baking and makes a final product lighter/taller.

So the answer to your question is, it depends. Does your muffin recipe use one of the liquid acids above? If not, you probably need to use both to get a nicely-risen muffin.

Flour:

This wikipedia entry is really good, but basically, whole-wheat flour is higher in gluten and protein because it contains the whole grain, all-purpose flour is a mid-grade with a medium amount of gluten and protein, and cake flour has low gluten to produce a lighter texture. Generally, if you're substituting whole wheat for all-purpose in a recipe it's best not to go above a 1/3 wheat 2/3 all-purpose ratio or you usually end up with something that is much tougher and chewier, though whole wheat flour is generally healthier than all-purpose (we get the all-purpose flour that has not been bleached).

In terms of making muffins/quickbreads more healthy, I have had luck substituting part whole wheat flour for the white in a recipe (generally 1/3 wheat to 2/3 white, any more than that and you run into the texture/hockey puck issue) and sometimes have used more fruit/vegetable (applesauce, zucchini, carrot, pumpkin) in lieu of some of the oil or shortening. Monkey also writes in her comment (in reference to her healthy muffin recipe):

"I'm thinking of making my muffins, but using silken tofu in place of the eggs, and adding unsweetened cocoa powder as well. This probably means I'll have to up the splenda-I'll be doing a batter taste test to get a sense of whether it's likely to be edible."

I think the eggs in a recipe are generally used to help bind ingredients together, and I've never baked with tofu so I can't tell you if it will serve the same purpose - silken tofu may make the batter more runny than you want, depending on how much you use. I've also never baked with splenda, so I can't help you there. I think it will definitely require some experiementation!

Cakes

I only started baking cakes from scratch about 10 years ago (and don't do it frequently) so I haven't spent as much time figuring out tips/tricks. I can say that I have never used cake flour in a cake recipe and my cakes have always turned out tasty, but maybe I'm missing out. My usual MO for cake-baking is to find a likely-looking recipe or 4 on AllRecipes.com and figure out the similarities/differences between them, then decide which one I'm going to use and make substitutions if I feel like it. I've had good luck plugging ingredient names into their search engine and finding exactly what I'm looking for (see here, where I made a chocolate zucchini rum cake). Baking is all about chemistry and, in my opinion, it's far easier to have something come out well if you use a recipe that you know has worked for someone.

One thing that's different about cakes than some other baked goods is that you want all your ingredients to be as close to room temperature as possible when you mix them. That means leaving the eggs and butter out of the fridge for a little while, or nuke them for a few seconds if they are cold. Also, I have better luck using a mixer (hand or stand) to mix a cake batter than if I do it by hand (unless I'm making the cake from a mix, in which case it makes no difference). Cake recipes often call for greased and floured pans, but I usually grease/sugar or grease/sugar/cocoa powder (for chocolate cakes) them, if I'm not using parchment paper (which I need to do more of, it makes life easier!) - using the grease/sugar method works just as well, and you don't have flour on the outside of your cake when you take it out.

Frosting cakes:

While I tend to use a cake recipe any time I'm baking one, I usually concoct my own frosting. I've got a basic buttercream recipe that my mom taught me as a wee youngster, and I just tend to tweak that to my own devices, depending on what kind of cake I've made. The difference between frosting and icing is that frosting has butter/shortening and icing does not. Icing is generally powdered sugar and a liquid, such as milk or alcohol, and if poured over a warm cake will soak in a bit, or if poured over a cool cake will harden and look cool. (You can also make chocolate icing with melted baking chocolate, powdered sugar, milk, and a bit of almond extract, but you have to heat it up). Anyway, basic buttercream frosting goes like this (all amounts are estimated, as I don't measure anything):

1 stick unsalted butter
2 cups powdered sugar
1/4-1/2 cup milk (we only use nonfat milk at home)
2 tsp vanilla

To softened butter in a mixing bowl, add about a cup of powdered sugar and some milk and vanilla and beat with a hand mixer. Keep mixing, adding powdered sugar, and adding milk until it's the consistency you want. Add a pinch of salt if it's too sweet. You can add cocoa powder (maybe 1/4-1/3 cup) to make chocolate frosting. You can reduce some of the butter and substitute cream cheese or neufchatel cheese for cream cheese frosting. You can flavor with rum, bourbon, or other tasty spirit in place of the vanilla. The world is your oyster! This recipe frosts a 9x13 or layered 8 inch round cake (but won't make enough for filling between the layers; I tend to use mashed strawberries or raspberries between cake layers or maybe some instant pudding) and leaves a little left over for decorating if you want to do that. Don't frost a warm cake, and if you're working in a warm room, refrigerate the frosting for a little while before you frost the cake, and cover it and refrigerate it after frosting so it won't melt and separate. And also, a cake will look prettier if you frost it with a really light layer called a crumb coat, let that set in the fridge for a while, and then frost it again with a heavier layer - that way, the crumbs are all sealed in so it's easier to keep the frosting looking nice and smooth.

My favorite cake I ever made was a butterfly-shaped cake for my old pal and roommate Bequi. I don't actually remember what kind of cake it was, but it was frosted with basic buttercream and I used raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, blueberries, gooseberries (green), and a variety of edible flowers to decorate it. It was so pretty!

OK, I've kind of run out of steam here - and I never wrote anything about cheesecake. Perhaps next week if I have any time between running errands as my sister's Bridal Slave (hee). If you have questions about anything I've written, or anything else baking-related, please leave them in the comments!

Fallback

Everybody has them, even people who love cooking. Even people who love to toil for hours in the kitchen. Even people who like variety in their diets, who won't admit it even if you caught them in the act.

Everybody has them. Those easy meals. The ones you put together at the last minute with stuff you always have on hand, because they are quick, filling, and don't require any thought whatsoever.

In our house, we have a few different meals like this. Stirfry. Pasta and sauce with ground turkey. Burritos. These are the worker bee meals, the ones that neither of us will ever sigh over in contentment or triumph, but they take very little time and effort and we're both full afterward. We don't resort to these meals especially often these days, particularly because Dan's only taking one class (and working) so it's not like last semester where he was out of the house from 8 am to 7 pm or 9 pm every day. Nope, so far this summer we've done a lot of experimenting, a lot of trying out of new ideas, a lot of exploring our culinary ranges. However, there's something to be said for these go-to meals, the unsung heroes of those of us that can't afford to (or don't want to) eat out.

Here are two versions of burritos. Version one is how I make them, and version two is how Dan makes them. Both versions are good (but mine are better, haha). Each takes little time, effort, and preparation, each can be made with ingredients we pretty much always have on hand, and each will fill your belly.

MLE's Burritos

1 can refried beans (black, with jalapenos, whatever, as long as there's no lard in 'em), heated in a pan on the stove (add a little water to help smooth them out)
1/2 pound ground turkey, browned and seasoned with whatever sounds tasty (chili powder, garlic, etc.)
lettuce
red or green bell pepper
yellow onion
tomato (if in season)
salsa
whole wheat tortillas
sharp cheddar or pepper jack cheese

Heat beans in pan on stove. Brown ground turkey, drain liquid and season. Heat whole wheat tortilla in frying pan, turning once and sprinkling with sharp cheddar cheese. Remove tortilla from heat to plate, and add a spoonfull of beans, some turkey, lettuce, bell pepper, onion, tomato, and a generous dollop of salsa. Fold up sides and roll up. Eat.

Dan's Burritos

1 can refried beans (see above)
1/2 pound ground turkey
1-2 yukon gold potatoes, chopped into small cubes
1/2 green or red bell pepper, chopped
1/2 yellow onion, chopped
salsa
1 can chicken green chili (optional)
Serve with mexican rice (white rice cooked and 1/2 can of tomatoes with jalapenos mixed in) (optional)

Brown turkey in small frying pan, drain. Sautee potatoes, bell pepper, and onion in medium frying pan until nearly cooked; add turkey and refried beans. Stir. Season with chili powder, cumin, garlic, and sometimes cinnamon (I know, but it's tasty!). Add generous amount of salsa. Microwave 2 whole wheat tortillas for a few seconds to soften. When bean mixture is heated through, sprinkle with sharp cheddar cheese. Scoop generous helping into tortilla, roll up, and top burrito with some green chili (it's a staple around these parts, usually made with pork, but we can get a chicken kind at the store too). Add torn lettuce leaf to your wife's burrito before rolling because she is an infidel and likes lettuce in her burritoes.

Both versions will end up with leftover filling if you are serving 2 people.

Fantasy weekend

Dan and I decided to try out some of our wedding gifts this weekend, and thought what better way to combine two things we wanted to do, camping and hiking, than with a trip to Pike's Peak.

Pike's Peak is perhaps Colorado's most famous 14-er (aka 14,000 foot high plus mountain). It's where Katherine Lee Bates penned "America the Beautiful" in 1893, it overlooks Stepford Springs (home to the Airforce Academy and Focus on the Family, amongst other treasures), and there are several ways you can ascend the mountain. You can take a cog railway to the top; you can drive up Pike's Peak highway ($10 a person, or $35/vehicle); you can start at the bottom and hike all the way up to the very top. Back before I moved here, Dan and I used a 30-year-old book about hiking 14ers in Colorado to try to hike to the top of Pike's Peak during one of my visits with no success - I guess after 30 years, the trail the book described was no longer there. We've talked for years about getting back to Pike's and conquering the beastly mountain, but had yet to make it.

On Friday, we talked about going camping, and if so, where might we go. We pulled out the updated version of the 14er book (a gift from Dan's parents) and saw that there was a campground to which one could hike, partway up Pike's Peak. The campground has dinner and breakfast available for purchase, and free water. And so we decided to give it a try. We'd pack lightly, only bringing our sleeping bags, pads, a tent, a little bit of food for the hikes, our camelback bladders (our backpacks are both designed to take water bladders), and a change of clothing. On Saturday morning we arose, made whole wheat pancakes for breakfast, and packed our backpacks, managing to fit everything and have both loads be manageable for hiking. The book described two different approaches to the campground on Pike's, one shorter and less of a climb than the other, which required parking at a trailhead partway up the Pike's Peak highway. Because of my leg, and because we'd be carrying everything on our backs for the hiking portion of the adventure, we didn't count on being able to summit, but decided that just trying it out would be fun. Saturday would be a 4.5 mile relatively flat hike to the campground, we'd get up early on Sunday, and hike up as far as my leg would allow, then all the way back down to the car.

Sounds like a great adventure, right?

Well...

I want to write that everything went as planned, that we drove down to Stepford and up to Pike's Peak highway and that they let us through without paying because we weren't driving to the top and that we hiked to the campground, had dinner and met some cool people doing the same adventure, woke up early on Sunday, and summited the peak before noon, then hiked all the way back down to the car. I want to write that. But I can't because it isn't what really happened.

This is what happened.

I was totally exhausted because of an early (for a weekend) morning due to some jerkiness by Loki, and so after breakfast I wasn't up for leaving yet, but ended up taking an hour-long nap. Then, we packed everything up and went to the grocery store, bought some sandwiches for the car ride down, and sweltered in the 100 degree weather. Our car doesn't have A/C, which isn't a big deal most of the time, but when you're riding in it for hours it can get a bit wearing. Anyhow, we made it down to the springs and followed the directions in the book to Pike's Peak highway, and got to where they make you pay to keep going. "Going up to the top?" the lady asked. "No, actually," we told her, and outlined our plan for driving to the trailhead and hiking to the camp and hiking to the summit tomorrow. "Oh, you can't do that," the lady told us. "First, you can't park overnight at the trailhead. Second, that campground is probably already full, because tomorrow is the Pike's Peak Hillclimb (roadrace) and the road is closed for that all day event."

Guh. Sometimes, it really sucks to try to do spontaneous things without doing internet research, and it just shows that we really need to get some internet at home. Ugh.

So, it turned out we wasted all that gas and all that time in the hot, hot car and all that excitement about finally camping and hiking a 14er. Because neither of us is familiar with the area, and we weren't prepared to camp anywhere that didn't provide food, we decided to just go home. Needless to say, when we got home, we were pretty bummed. We had a good dinner, and we played gin, and I briefly talked to Simon who was having fun at the BlogHer party, but mostly we were both just sad.

Sunday we decided we could at least go hiking, and because it's been so freaking hot here I was hoping that getting out of town would give us a slight relief from the heat. Seriously, it hasn't cooled down below 80 degrees at night in the past several days and we don't have A/C in the house, either, so my quality of sleep has gotten pretty bad. We thought hiking up in Boulder behind NCAR (the National Center for Atmospheric Research) might be a good plan. There are quite a few different trails to explore of all different levels of difficulty. Alas, though the idea was a good one, we took a wrong turn somewhere and ended up doing a far less interesting hike than planned - and I must be fighting something off, because I ran out of energy really quickly, so we only got about 2 hours of hiking in. And the car was an oven when we got back. We stopped at Target on the way home where I attempted to find a cheap one-piece bathing suit for lap swimming (no luck) and we looked for a swamp cooler (no luck). But I did find what I was looking for in Cross Dress for Less in the same shopping center - a black racerback swimsuit for 8 bucks. I can't wait to go swimming on Tuesday.

Less than a week left before I leave for California. My sister's wedding purse is in progress, I have all kinds of lists to make, and more than anything I am looking forward to some Bay Area summer fog. Because 100 degrees during the day and 80+ at night? It's for the birds, man.

Heartbreaker

Between when my relationship with College Boyfriend ended and when I met Dan was a span of about 18 months during which time I actually, like, went on dates with people for the first time ever. In the fall of 2000 I met a guy on BART who made me laugh, and who pestered me for my phone number. Thinking nothing of it, I gave it to him. He called me a day or two later and pestered me until I agreed to hang out with him. Thus began my brief thing (I hesitate to call it a relationship; I considered the situation quite casual) with the Chef.

I call him the Chef because he was a professional chef. He had worked in all kinds of restaurants and loved the inventive, creative side of cooking. One of the most fun things we ever did was go to the grocery store one evening. He stood in the produce area, stock still, for at least five minutes, and then began picking out items to turn into a fabulous feast. That night I learned how to peel/devein shrimp, how to make rice noodles into those fun puffy worms, and I watched him make a caesar salad dressing from scratch (he used some citrus in addition to the usual ingredients). Unfortunately, the good times were few and far between, and while I thought the arrangement was more of a casual dating thing, it turned out he was in love with me. He was also five years older, had had drug and alcohol issues in the past, and he wasn't smart. At all. So eventually I broke it off with him (actually, it was the day before Valentine's Day and he tried to give me the gift he'd bought anyway and I didn't let him and I still feel bad about breaking up with him at that time but I was really over the whole situation and I was only 21 years old for eff's sake). I maintain that the only good things to come out of the deal was that I learned how to toss things in a frying pan one-handed (I rarely use a spatula for cooking tossable food in a pan), I learned how to make salad dressing from scratch (you drizzle the oil into the vinegar/citrus/etc really slowly and whisk the whole time), and I learned how to play competitive Scrabble - all three of which have served me over the years since I broke it off with him.

During part of the time we dated and for a while afterward, the Chef worked at a Caribbean restaurant in the Piedmont area of Oakland. Sometimes I'd go there while he was working and I never had to pay for my meal - and everything he sent me from the kitchen was delicious (it's still the best bread pudding I've ever had, for example). Many of the things I ate at this restaurant were foods I tried for the first time ever - jerk chicken and salmon, jalapeno corn bread, and mango salsa. One of my favorite things was a ceviche - I don't even remember what was in it, only that it was really good. And so last night when Dan made a mango-shrimp ceviche for dinner I thought of the Chef and tipped my proverbial hat to his cooking skills. The man I married may not be a professional chef, and I may have passed on a thing or two I learned from the pro I dated briefly, but he sure can cook. This is the recipe he threw together.

Mango-Shrimp Ceviche (makes about 2.5 or 3 cups)

Approximately 20 51-60 count shrimp, thawed, peeled, and deveined
One small mango, peeled, flesh cut into very small chunks (we used the kind that is yellow and a bit smaller, not the kind that starts green and turns red/pink)
A handful of cilantro, chopped fine
1/4 medium size red onion, chopped fine
1/4 red bell pepper, chopped fine
2 cloves garlic, chopped fine
Juice of 5 limes (I think it worked out to be about 1/2 cup lime juice)
A few splashes of apple cider vinegar
1/2 tsp ground cumin
1/2 tsp dried oregano
1/2 tsp chipotle chili powder
Salt and pepper to taste (don't taste it while the shrimp is still raw though)

Chop shrimp into pieces (they don't all have to be the same size) and mix with all other ingredients. Let refrigerate for a couple of hours until the flesh of the shrimp has become opaque and pinkish. EAT.

Dan served this with warm corn tortillas, coconut rice (rice made with leftover coconut milk from the thai curry we had the other night), refried black beans, and a simple slaw of napa cabbage and carrots. So we kind of ate it like soft tacos. SO GOOD. mmm. It could also be used as a dip for tortilla chips.

Hungry

Yesterday, I decided to exercise twice despite the two hour bike ride on Sunday. I hamstered for a while on the elliptical trainer at lunchtime, and after work I went to my normal weights class. But it wasn't the regular instructor, and the substitue is someone known at my gym for teaching really difficult classes. Yesterday was no exception; there was some stuff I couldn't do because of my leg (the 1-10-1 jumping jacks/pushups pyramid was done all on my left leg) and a lot of stuff that was really, really hard. I was quite knackered after the workout was over and called OF while I walked home, and didn't realize until I'd been home about 10 minutes and hung up the phone with her exactly how spacey and out-of-it I really was. Then I kind of fell over. Then I ate a handful of walnut pieces and some turkey, flopped on the couch, and asked Dan if he could get me some juice, because hoo boy that was some low blood sugar. Last night before bed, Dan got this worried look on his face and confronted me about the incident, and I reassured him that I'd eaten enough food (I had! just should have eaten sooner after that second workout).

Today during the breathing part of my yoga class, the instrutor (as always) said something about focusing on the reasons you come to your mat, giving thanks for those intentions, and I decided to give thanks for the ability to do yoga again. I am really, really sore from all the crazy pushups and other stuff I did yesterday, but I was still able to do most of the yoga poses and flow from one to the next without too much difficulty. I have plans to go swimming for the first time in ages after work at a local pool. But I didn't count on the hunger. Today I brought with me string cheese, an orange, some baby carrots and grape tomatoes, and some leftover black bean/corn salad. It wsn't enough. I am really, really hungry now, and in a few minutes it'll be time to go home. If I eat right when I get home, I'll have a lead belly while I'm trying to swim. So I'm not sure what I'll do. I burned a lot of calories the past few days, because my leg is finally up for extended exercise (and I'm sure swimming will be good for it, too), and I *want* to be burning calories. But I also don't want another low-blood-sugar incident, so I'm not sure what to do.

This black bean and corn salad is the only good thing to come out of my first full-time job in Colorado (meaning, not a temp job) - I worked at the state Medicaid agency and they paid me to do things like sort/count paper clips and hanging file tabs. I'm not even kidding. It was the worst working environment I'd ever been in (even worse than the publishing company in the Bay Area with the misogynistic boss who only hired women he thought would be subservient) and morale was terribly low for the whole five months I worked there. But one time, there was a potluck, and a lady who worked there brought this black bean/corn salad. And it was SO GOOD. I made it last week to go with a meal of turkey brats and grilled zucchini/asparagus.

Black bean/corn salad (scaled down to serve 2 with some leftovers)

1 14.5 oz can black beans, rinsed and drained
1 small can (9 oz?) corn (or you could use a cup of fresh off the cob or frozen), drained
1/3 chopped red bell pepper
1/3 chopped medium size red onion
handful chopped cilantro
1 tsp ground cumin
1 tsp ground coriander
1 tsp chili powder
juice of 1/2 lime
1 tsp olive oil
few dashes rice wine vinegar
optional: 1/2 finely diced jalapeno

Mix everything up in a bowl and let it sit for an hour or so in the fridge to let the flavors meld together. Eat. SO GOOD.

Underpants circa 1982

Money I spent on a bike helmet, bike lock, swim goggles, groceries, sandals, new undies and a new skirt this weekend: Far, far too much

Thing I said that made Dan laugh: "Now that I have a bike helmet, I can go swimming!"

Favorite undies I bought: look like something Lisa Frank might have designed, with rainbows, clouds, hearts and stars in early '80s colors. I am wearing them today. $1.99 at Ross!

Bike ride we took yesterday: 2 hours, probably went about 10 miles

Last time I rode a bike anywhere except atop the old city wall in Xi'an: 1999

Panic attacks I almost had riding over train tracks because it reminded me of my bike accident back in 1999: 2

Cost to swim (or at least, play in the water) at Confluence Park: Free, though no lifeguard is on duty, and we saw about 100 people and dogs of all ages enjoying the free way to cool off

Cost to ride a "gondola" poled by a barefoot college student down part of Cherry Creek toward Confluence Park: No idea, and the views aren't exactly what I would consider romantic, though the ride probably smells better than Venice.

Loads of laundry, washed: 5

Loads of laundry, hung dry/dried in dryer: 4/1 (I won't hang towels dry, because scratchy towels suck)

Best meal cooked: Thai green curry stir-fried veggies over wide rice noodles

We didn't use a recipe and just sort of threw it together quickly because we were really hungry, but here's the gist of it.

Thai green curry with stir-fried veggies (serves 2 really big servings, or maybe 3 regular-sized ones)

Chop up any or all of the following veggies:
1 cup mushrooms
2 large carrots (bias-cut)
2 celery stalks (bias-cut)
1/3 red bell pepper
3-4 leaves napa cabbage, sliced thinly
1 baby bok choy, slice each leaf in half lengthwise

We could have added any number of other vegetables but this is what we had around.

Compose a green curry using 1/2 can coconut milk plus equivalent amount of water, some thai green curry paste, and some lime juice in a pot. Let it simmer while you cook the veggies.

Follow package directions for rice noodles. Ours said to pour hot water over noodles and let them sit for 5-8 minutes, so that's what we did. They were a little chewy, particularly since some of them stuck together, so next time we will stir them a bit while they soak.

Mash up 1/2 block of firm tofu with a fork so it's in little pieces, and season with whatever sounds good. I think Dan used the juice from half a lime, some soy sauce, and some singapore seasoning (from Penzeys).

Cook the mushrooms, carrots, celery, and bell pepper in a wok over high heat with a bit of oil, rice vinegar, and some more spices/seasonings. Chop up some cilantro and thai basil and add that. Add the tofu. When veggies are nearly done, add the napa cabbage and baby bok choy so they wilt but don't get too cooked. Add some whole thai basil leaves if you feel like it.

When noodles are ready, drain and add to bowl. Pour 1/2 veggie mixture over each bowl of noodles. Add green curry. Eat with chopsticks and spoon to get all that tasty green curry goodness.

Food, society, and culture: musings, part 1

The other night, we went over to Julie and Steve's for dinner. The meal was simple, yet delicious, with fresh, healthy ingredients. I helped Julie cook and listened to her latest life update while Dan and Steve chatted in the other room, and when it was all finished (the pasta, the sauce with fresh veggies and lean ground turkey, the garlic bread and the salad), the four of us sat down to enjoy the meal together. This is something I love, to make food with friends and to eat the food together while we enjoy one another's company and nourish our bodies at the same time. Cooking and eating with a group of people is one of my very favorite things to do, whether it's midnight sushi with Leah and Simon, fondue with Sara and Ron, or Julie's latke party - the sharing of food with friends is wonderful.

I find it fascinating how different cultures view food, and the role that food plays in social gatherings around the world. The act of preparing food and/or eating with other people is so intrinsic to the way Americans relate to one another on a social level. Think about it - going out to lunch with coworkers, or attending a work-related social function. Dating. Making food for a significant other, or a child, or an ailing parent or friend. Funeral-baked meats/casseroles. Wedding cake. So many times when it's so important - you share this food with me, therefore we have a common bond. We celebrate our holidays with food, dishes only associated with certain holidays and so become celebratory in themselves - in my family, lasagna and enchiladas are Christmas treats, just as much as Christmas cookies. Barbecue for the fourth of July. Ham for Easter. Thanksgiving is pretty much a holiday solely focused on food - the celebration IS the meal, and we have special foods to commemorate it - the turkey, the stuffing, the cranberry sauce, foods that many people only eat once a year. Food is so important to Americans on so many levels - and not just food, but abundance of food. It's hard to view food as what it really is in our society, fuel for our bodies, when so much of our culture focuses on food as sensual pleasure, food as societal bond, food as love.

As I've been writing out these recipes for the first bit of this month, I've thought each and every time about that particular food, and who I have eaten it with. Particular foods remind me of particular events, and particular people - food associations, I guess you could say. I've also thought a lot about which foods I should write about - should they be the ones I like best? The ones that are easiest to make? The dishes most people would be interested in trying to make themselves? It's a difficult thing to decide, a difficult balance to tread. If anyone out there is reading this and has suggestions, please, by all means share!

There are so many ways to think about food, especially when you're me and you're trying to fit into a bridesmaid dress in a couple of weeks and your leg prevents you from losing that winter layer and the heat makes you not want to eat anything but your blood sugar begs to differ and summer in Colorado means so many good things to eat that are difficult at best to get the rest of the year. So I write about salads, about simple dishes, about things that I cook because I enjoy them and things that I cook because they are good for me, and things that I cook because I have always cooked them. There are things that I would like to eat, but don't, things that I restrict from my diet because they are not good for me (white foods, made with processed flour and white sugar, are horrible for keeping my blood sugar stable) but also because they are not good for my waistline. I attended a bridal shower for a work colleague yesterday that took place in a local restaurant. I brought my own lunch and ate it ahead of time, so while everyone else ate sandwiches, soups, and salads, I sipped water, and when everyone else exclaimed over the chocolate cake, I sipped more water. "Couldn't you have had just a little piece of cake?" asked Dan when I mentioned it, but I told him I'd rather save the calories for a little bit of chocolate after dinner, which in the long run is better for me anyway. But I'll tell you, I felt like more of an outsider than ever. Being the only one in the room not eating cake isn't the easiest thing I've ever done, but that's who I am - I'd rather take care of me than fit in with the rest of the group. And I'm sure as hell going to eat cake at my sister's wedding in a few weeks. But only a small piece.

Ik!

I was a rather picky eater as a child. I didn't like flavorful, spicy things, I didn't like mushrooms, I didn't like most vegetables (though grew to love them when prepared differently, the only veggie I can't stand now is brussels sprouts but that's because they taste like feet smell). I guess I was a typical kid in that respect. I don't exactly remember when I started liking more things and trying out new flavors, but I do remember the first time I ate guacamole and really enjoyed it - I was maybe eight or nine, and my mom was trying out a new Mexican-type meal of some sort. Burritos? Anyhow, I really liked the guacamole, and over the years as I grew up we'd sometimes get avocados and make guac as a treat - not something we had very frequently, but something that was thoroughly enjoyed by all when we did have it.

These days, for some reason, the grocery store where we buy produce often has avocados on sale. I've never liked avocados on their own (they taste too fatty to me, but I don't like a lot of fatty-tasting things like macadamia nuts, so maybe it's just a mouthfeel thing), but I loves me some good, freshly-made guacamole. We have it once every three or four weeks, buying the avocados a few days ahead of time to make sure we catch them at the appropriate ripeness. Here's how we make it at Casa Pantalones del Nerd (all amounts, again, are estimates because I don't measure anything).

Guacamole!

2 ripe avocados (will give to the touch but not mushy)
1/4 finely chopped medium red or yellow onion
1/4 finely chopped red bell pepper (can you tell yet that I really like red bell pepper?)
1/2 cup jarred medium heat salsa (we use a kroger brand Chipotle flavor called Salsa Grande)
1 medium tomato, seeded, drained, and diced (if in season, meaning if we have them ripe in our garden)
good handful of cilantro, finely chopped
juice of 1/2 lime
garlic powder and chili powder to taste (maybe 1/2-1 tsp each?)
Salt and pepper to taste
Optional: splash of tequila
And the secret ingredient? Maya-ik hot sauce from Guatemala, a good squirt

Slice avocados lengthwise around pit. Twist and open so that the pit is in only half the fruit. Take a knife and make a quick chopping motion to embed the knife in the pit for easy removal. Score the flesh of the avocado into small pices (make lines lengthwise and widthwise with a paring knife) and use a spoon to scoop fruit out of skin and into bowl. Add onion and bell pepper. We use a chopper kind of like this one inherited from Dan's grandma for our fine chopping needs. Add salsa, tomato, and cilantro. Squeeze lime and add juice. Add seasonings and tequila if you want. Mash it all up with a potato masher like this one. Taste and add seasonings as needed. Because of the salsa, it's not as green as guac from the store, but boy, is it tasty. Serve immediately with tortilla chips (or julienned veggies, if you're feeling saintly) or use on burgers, in burritos, etc. This recipe makes enough for four people to snack on or two people to get sick on.

Summer salads

(For Monkey, because she asked nicely)

See, the thing about living in Denver is that it is hot in the summer. A dry heat, to be sure, but consistently hot. And there's no large body of water around to cool things off at night, so when we don't get afternoon thunderstorms (which we haven't gotten ANY so far this year, WTF Colorado?) it can stay really hot even at night. Our house is old and leaky and we don't have air conditioning, so when it's in the 90s or higher for days on end and not cooling off at night, the last thing we want to do is heat up the kitchen any more than we have to.

So what do we do? We eat a lot of salad. Dinner-sized, delicious salads that are healthy and produce minimal heat to prepare. Here are three dinner salads we make fairly regularly during the summer.

Poached salmon salad with strawberries (makes 2 dinner-size salads)

1/2 pound salmon fillet (we try to buy wild when possible, but this year it's just way too expensive)
assortment of fresh herbs (basil, dill, lemon thyme, what have you), chopped

Poach salmon in a pan over low heat, skin side down, in some water with the herbs on top. You can add citrus juice (lemon, lime), rice vinegar, whatever. When fish is cooked, remove skin, transfer to a plate, and stick in the fridge to cool off.

Meanwhile, compose (in two large eating bowls) a salad of
spinach
green leaf lettuce
cucumbers, sliced and quartered
carrots (we use a vegetable peeler to make carrot peels/curls)
strawberries, chopped
red onion, diced

in whatever quantities sound good. Add some goat cheese if you're feeling feisty. We do. Toss with balsamic vinegrette (Dan makes this from scratch, but I'm sure bottled stuff would be fine).

When fish is cool, split in half and place half atop each salad. Serve with some crusty bread or just eat as-is.

Taco Salad (makes 2 dinner-sized salads)

1/2 pound ground turkey, browned, drained, and cooked in taco seasoning (either made from scratch or a mix) and a little liquid (water?) to make sure meat is coated

Green or red leaf lettuce
red onion, diced
handful of cilantro, chopped
1/2 regular size can of black beans
corn, either from a can or the cob (if using fresh, cut kernals from cob and then steam a few minutes)
chopped red bell pepper
chopped tomato (if in season)

in whatever amounts appeal to you

Toss vegetable ingredients, then top with taco-ised turkey, a few crumbled tortilla chips, and a bit of grated extra sharp cheddar cheese (because I'm going to eat flavorful cheese if I'm going to eat cheese at all). We use a dressing made of half jarred salsa, half ranch.

Chef Salad (again, makes 2 large dinner salads)

Green or red leaf lettuce
Spinach
red onion, diced
red and/or yellow bell pepper, chopped
cucumber, sliced and quartered
carrot, chopped or in peels
sugar snap peas, chopped into small pieces
fresh tomato, chopped (if in season)

in amounts best pleasing to you

Toss together and top with:
cubed extra sharp cheddar cheese (small cubes)
a few slices of lunch meat (we use turkey for me and ham/turkey for Dan), chopped into small pieces
one hardboiled egg for each salad, sliced

Dress with anything that sounds good. I prefer spicy tomato dressing but you can use just about anything.

et voila! Three summer salads, tasty and healthy, that don't require much cooking or heating of the kitchen.

Anyone else have good salad recipes or ideas? I'm going to experiment a bit with salads this summer, so I'll write more about that later.

I don't know what it's called, but I like it.

One of the first cookbooks I ever used was called the Teddy Bear cookbook. Designed specifically for children, it taught the user how to follow a recipe, and how to make simple yet tasty things. When Scarlett would come for visits, we'd often choose to make something out of this cookbook - sometimes teddy bear pancakes, but more frequently apple pizzas.

Because they were pizzas! Covered in apples! What's not to like? A sweet dough, with cinnamon/sugar apples, apple pizzas were the best, man. And really easy to make.

I flashed back to the apple pizzas this weekend when I thought to myself, "I want to make a pie" and realized it would be absolute torture to have to use the oven during the nasty heat. So I tried to think of some other way to combine fruit and crust without needing the oven. We got a bunch of summer fruit at the grocery store, and that evening I looked through the Joy of Cooking at pastry recipes, trying to decide what I could do.

Finally, it hit me. A galette-style dessert, a very rustic pastry with fruit, the dough brought up and around the sides of the fruit in the middle. I could make it in two batches and cook it in the toaster oven, rather than heating up the entire kitchen. And so I made things up as I went along, and we ate my creation for dessert with vanilla ice cream (just a bit). It doesn't have a name, but boy was it tasty.

Summer fruit galette with cornmeal crust

Crust:
3/4 cup all purpose flour
1/2 cup cornmeal (we use the roughly ground stuff)
1/4 cup powdered sugar
1/2 tsp salt
4 tbsp (1/2 stick) butter
4 tsp butter flavored shortening
1/4 c ice water

Mix all dry ingredients, then cut in butter and shortening using pastry blender. Pour ice water over mixture and cut in using the side of a butter knife or rubber spatula until mixture forms ball of dough. Refrigerate for an hour or so.

Filling:
approximately 3-4 cups summer fruit (I used halved and pitted bing cherries, 2 medium size nectarines, and a handful of blackberries)
1 tsp sugar

After dough has cooled for an hour, separate into two balls. Roll out each ball on floured surface to about a 8-9 inch circle and place on cookie sheet (or on toaster oven tray). Put half the fruit mixture in the center of each rolled out pastry and bring the edges up and over the fruit so it is partly covered but exposed in the center. Bake at 375F for 20-25 minutes (I cooked mine separately because I could only fit one at a time and each of mine took 23 minutes) or until crust starts to brown just a bit on the top.

Serve warm with ice cream, whipped cream, or by its lonesome (so tasty!). Makes 4 very large or 6 medium-sized servings.

Lost Bread

Now THAT was the weekend I needed. We pretty much did absolutely nothing and it was absolutely wonderful. The only productive activities were grocery shopping and a liquor store run (for beer, girl beer, and white wine) - it's been really hot until today and both of us felt like having some beer (Mike's Hard Pomegranate Lemonade for me, which doesn't taste like pomegranate but is still pretty good). Other than that, we did whatever we felt like - took long naps, played with a frisbee in the park, painted our fingernails (me) and toenails (both! I totally painted Dan's toenails while we watched Terminator 2. It was fun). I worked on a Seecret Knitting Project that is turning out to be both fun and challenging, and Dan played a lot of chess on the computer.

But mostly, we cooked, ate, and cleaned up after several tasty, tasty meals. There were some successful experiments (a new rustic fruit pastry! Pizza cooked on the barbeque!) and some tried-and-true classics (Spinach, mushroom, and goat cheese omelettes with kiwi/pineapple and turkey bacon; spinach salad with poached salmon and strawberries). And because this is FoodBlop Month, I'm going to write all about it.

But first, a breakfast favorite around the Pantalones Del Nerd household: French Toast. Or, as the French call it, lost bread (pain perdue?). This is something that I've been making since I was a little kid, and while we eat it pretty rarely, when we do it is so, so good. MMMM.

MLE's French Toast (makes 8 pieces) (all amounts are estimated, since I don't actually measure anything)

4 eggs
1/4-1/3 cup milk
2 tsp vanilla

Mix this all up with a fork or whisk until blended. Add
1/2-1 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1/2 tsp ground cloves
(you can also use ginger or allspice, but I tend to just pick 3 spices and go with it)

Whisk this together quickly to get the spices as well-integrated as you can into the egg mixture, since they will float and coat the early pieces of bread, leaving the later pieces bereft of spiciness.

Dredge 8 pieces of whole wheat bread in egg mixture (I use a wide-rimmed shallow bowl to accomodate the bread, since I like to leave the bread in the batter for a few seconds to give it time to soak up egg) and cook on nonstick skillet or frying pan (add some nonstick spray first, or some butter if you're feeling up to the extra calories). I leave them on each side until well-browned to make sure the egg inside is cooked.

Serve with fruit to top (chopped strawberries, raspberries, etc.) and maple syrup or agave nectar. I generally eat 3 pieces, Dan eats 4, and there's one leftover for a snack later on.

Seven years of assgrabs and pie

So, seven years ago today Dan proposed to me over IM with the letter O, which is why we consider today our anniversary. I was thinking about it in the shower this morning, about all the adventures we've had, the places we've gone (China! Italy! The Grand Canyon!), the hours-long talks over the phone and IM and in our comfy bed, the dancing around the kitchen and the assgrabs and the tears and the hugs and the joy. So much joy.

In honor of the last seven years, I'm going to write about pie. Because why not? I like pie. Dan likes pie. Pie is really, really tasty, despite being a sometimes food (tm Cookie Monster). My love affair with pie goes back to early childhood, when we ate pie at Thanksgiving (pumpkin, always), when we used apples from the neighbor's tree to make apple pie in the fall, when I picked blackberries off the bush way up on the ridge and brought them home to mix with peaches and pour into a crust. I've been baking since I was a little kid (I think I baked my first solo cookies at around age six) and absolutely love to make pie fresh from scratch, going so far as to process a sugar pumpkin for the best pumpkin pie ever.

Pies I have made:

Chocolate chiffon
Cranberry-cherry (made up my own recipe for this)
Pumpkin, both from canned pumpkin and processed sugar pumpkin
Apple
Blackberry Peach
Strawberry Rhubarb
Lime (used regular limes instead of key limes, and it was still quite tasty)
Cherry (from canned, frozen, and fresh cherries)
Peach
Apricot
Sweet potato

I've never made a pecan pie (too tooth-hurtingly sweet for me) or a chess pie or a shoofly pie. I tend to try to make pies that are as healthy as can be (it's still pie, so it's not GOOD for you, but I can certainly make changes to a recipe to up the nutritional value.

And I always make the crust from scratch. Many people shy away from making pie crust, because it can be really, really temperamental. Perhaps I've just made so many that it's not that hard for me, or perhaps I just have good luck with it. But here are my tips for good pie crust.

1. Use a mixture of unsalted butter and butter flavored shortening; you get the best of both worlds. And always keep them as cold as possible (I keep my shortening in the freezer and chop it up into bits before adding it to the flour).

2. Add some spices to the crust, it can really jazz up the flavor. The spices I use vary depending on pie, but I've been known to put in cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg, allspice, and ginger (not all in the same crust of course!)

3. The less you work with the dough, the better. Since Colorado has such a dry climate, I have to use more water in my pie crust recipe than is generally called for, but the secret to a good, flaky dough is to not touch it too much. I sprinkle in water and toss it around with a fork, and when the dough is wet enough I scoop some up in my hands to roll it out, forming into a lump right before I start attacking with the rolling pin.

4. Use flour-sprinkled waxed paper on whatever surface on which you're rolling out the crust. It's much easier to transfer it to the dish or top of the pie if you can just pick it up, flip it over, and peel off the waxed paper, rather than trying to roll it around the rolling pin.

5. Homemade pie crust is nearly impossible to use for making lattice-top pies. If you want the dough to be flaky and tasty, you can't touch it much, which means when you cut lattice strips and start working with them, they will fall apart. The only time I'll ever use storebought pie crust is to make a lattice-top pie.

6. Use a fork to vent holes in the top of a two-crust pie, and always try to make a funky design or spell something that will make Dan (or yourself, or whoever) laugh. This is the secret to a really good pie.

What is your favorite kind of pie?

Because it tastes better if you make it yourself

I have to admit, when it comes to food, cooking, and food preparation I've oftentimes had to consider myself a purist. I tend to do things the old-fashioned way, even when there are gadgets for my convenience; for example, I usually mix cookie dough and cake batter by hand with a wooden spoon even though we have a Kitchenaid stand mixer now. While I'll admit that there are benefits to shortcuts and fancy equipment, sometimes it just doesn't feel right unless you do it the way it's always been done (or unless you make it yourself).

Take hummus, for example. Store-bought hummus is generally OK, but it's a little thick and dry for my taste. Plus, a little container costs like $3-4. Have you ever read the ingredients on hummus? It's a pretty basic foodstuff, and not at all difficult or expensive to make fresh, from scratch, especially if you have a food processor. I like to make hummus in the summer (though I make it all year, I want to eat it more in the summer because it's cold, tasty, full of fiber and protein, and doesn't heat up the kitchen). One of the few meals that I am the one in our house who cooks is falafel with hummus, pita, veggies, and yogurt/cucumber/dill sauce (Dan cooks most dinners, and usually I'll cook things he cooks, and he'll cook things I cook, but we have a few meals each that are specialties).

MLE's tasty, tasty hummus (makes about two cups)

1 can garbanzo beans (also known as chickpeas), drained, reserve some of the liquid (we use the low-salt variety)
4-6 cloves fresh garlic, depending on size and how much you like garlic
1 tbsp tahini (sesame seed butter)
juice of one lemon
1/2 medium tomato
a few dashes crushed red pepper, depending on how spicy you like it
salt & pepper to taste

Combine all ingredients in food processor until blended, using reserved liquid from garbanzo beans to make it the right consistency. I have varied this recipe depending on what we have in the house; you can substitute olive oil for the tahini, and the tomato is optional but I feel it adds a nice sweetness and depth of flavor. I've also put in red bell pepper from time to time.

I use hummus instead of other condiments on sandwiches, in wraps, and as a dip for veggies. It is super healthy and tasty and full of protein that keeps my blood sugar stable.

Midsummer Month's Blopping

I've participated in NaBloPoMo for the past two years, and now it's expanded to be every month (not just November). Each month has a theme, and while I'm not up for trying to write a post every day in July (lack of internets at home makes blopping nigh unpossible on the weekends), I am interested in food. And writing about it. So I'm going to write about food sometimes this month. And you are going to like it.

First up: Thai spring rolls

Our 3-month wedding anniversary was on Sunday, so Dan and I decided to make a nice dinner. We decided to make thai spring rolls (making use of some of the thai basil in the garden), edamame, and wonton skins filled with red bean paste. Luckily, the only things we needed at the grocery store to make this fine meal were shrimp and carrots. We got to use some of our new kitchen equipment (bamboo steamer for the edamame) and, after some major teamwork, had a tasty and relatively healthy celebratory meal.

Thai spring rolls (makes 4) (which is enough for 2 people if you add in some edamame and some wonton skins filled with red bean paste)

4 spring roll wrappers (the big kind, I think they are 9x9 inches?)
2 carrots, shredded
3 large lettuce leaves, shredded
12 leaves thai basil (you can use regular basil or mint, but I like thai basil a lot)
a handful of rice vermicelli
16 51-60 size raw shrimp, defrosted, peeled and deveined
1/4 red bell pepper, julienned thinly

1. Prep the veggies and boil water for rice vermicelli (often sold as rice stick noodles, the really really thin kind)
2. Season shrimp with something that sounds tasty. We used this but you could use garlic or any variety of seasonings.
3. Sautee shrimp with a very small amount of oil in a nonstick pan until cooked, about 2 minutes (toss occasionally). Transfer shrimp to small bowl and refrigerate.
4. Toss handful of rice vermicelli into boiling water. Cook for 2 minutes, then drain and run cold water over the noodles for 30 seconds or so to cool them off.
5. Soak spring roll wrappers one at a time - we have to use a cookie sheet with high sides - maybe this is a jelly roll pan? - to make sure the wrapper fits and can be completely submerged.
6. Pay attention to spring roll wrappers - touch them frequently to see how pliable they are. If you wait too long, they'll fall apart.
7. When each wrapper is at the correct consistency, drain and transfer to a plate. On each wrapper, place some lettuce, carrot, noodles, red bell pepper, 4 cooked shrimp and 3 thai basil leaves. Roll up like a burrito (fold sides in).
8. When all 4 wrappers are filled, you can refrigerate for a while or eat right away.

I also made an impromptu peanut sauce with natural style chunky peanut butter (ingredient: peanuts), some soy sauce and some brown sugar. We drizzled this on the thai spring rolls and it was mighty tasty.

As for the less-than-healthy portion of our dinner, we opened a can of red bean paste, spread some on the middle of four wonton skins that had been in the freezer since God was a boy (so it took forever to defrost them and they were all weird and mushy), topped each with another wonton skin, and fried them until they were cooked, turning occasionally. We don't eat much fried food so wonton skins (either filled with something or alone) are a guilty pleasure. Also, it's fun to put uncooked rice vermicelli in the hot oil because they get all weird and puffy and snakelike in like 2 seconds.

It was a really yummy dinner.

Damn it feels good to be a gangsta

I haven't talked much about my leg in a while, but this weekend was pretty leg-focused, or perhaps leg-centric, as on Saturday we walked about 5 miles to REI and back (finally bought Dan's sleeping bag with some gift cards and our wedding gift from Monkey, thanks again Monkey!). The big REI flagship store is right next to Confluence Park, where Cherry Creek and the South Platte River meet, and Saturday afternoon saw oodles of people enjoying the day (the first day it had been cooler than 80 degrees in a while) and quite a few dogs playing in the water. Two dogs in particular, a black and a yellow lab, swam happily through the current after gravel tossed by their owner and, after getting swept downstream over and over again, made their way over to the bank and back only to repeat the process. Dan had a good time taking photos and I dipped my feet in the cool water, face shaded by my big floppy hat. Saturday was a good day.

Sunday, we had a hard time getting motivated. We had talked about going hiking, and decided Sunday would be better since we'd get more benefit from the cooler weather in the foothills. Because we were lazy and enjoying the morning, we didn't get started hiking until around 2 PM. But it was worth the trip up to Evergreen - we hiked about 5 miles along a gorgeous trail, saw all kinds of pretty wildflowers, mountain bicyclists, and lots and lots of dogs. Two of them, a yellow lab and a black something mutt-ish, greeted us as we sat on a bench at the halfway point eating a snack. By the time we got back to the car, I knew that my leg was DONE. The PT said I could try some relatively easy hiking and just see how my leg did, so we picked a relatively easy trail. While it was a nice hike, I felt like most of my body could have done much, much more - if it weren't for this whole leg thing.

I haven't written a lot of really meaty posts on here recently. I've been feeling kind of down, if you hadn't guessed, and I think a lot of it has to do with my leg. Sure, I can walk just fine. I can do the elliptical trainer and ride the stationary bike at the gym. I can lift weights. I can do a (really easy, not especially challenging) hike. But there's so many things I still can't do, and it will be a long time before I can do. I can't run. I can't dance (not that the PT told me not to, but every time I've tried it hurts). I can't do a lot of yoga or pilates so I don't bother going to class. I certainly can't climb 14ers. There are things I wanted to do this summer that I can't do. Having physical restrictions is really frustrating. I want to be able to climb mountains! Mostly I want to be able to dance at my sister's wedding in early August, so I'm going to do what it takes to rehab my leg properly. The waiting game sucks.

In other news, I have a bike now! Dan's mom gave me her old bike and since we're the same height it will work for me. I just have to get a bike helmet.

Also, may I recommend the song mentioned in the title of this post for driving purposes? It's on the Office Space soundtrack, and really gets your head bobbing.

Bathroom adventures

This week the ladies' room at work has smelled like sewage gas all week (today it's the worst) and when I went in there a few minutes ago there were 3 cockroaches.

Gross.

I told you he would review it better than I ever could

Thanks, guy that I married. You are awesome.

Jobs I would not want to have.

* Pole dancer

* Jizz mopper

* Roadie

* Cleaner of grease traps in industrial kitchens

* Carnie

* Mime

* Door-to-door salesperson

* Call center drone

* TSA personnel

* Fish cleaner (in a cannery, for example)

* Person who cleans up slaughterhouse floor

* Professional dominatrix

The little robot that could

I really like my gym. I like that they have lots of warm towels available at all times, and that they have so many different kinds of classes. The weights areas are spread out, rather than everyone trying to use equipment at the same time. They have thick mats for post-workout stretching, inflatable balls for crunching, and a billion TVs all tuned to something different. In the summer, the gym smells of kids' lunches because of the summer day camp, with the occasional small human napping on a mat in a corner and lots more chaos than usual. All in all, I'm quite pleased.

One of the perks I've noticed is that occasionally, there will be free passes to a screening of a movie available on the front counter. Last week I happened to be passing by and saw a stack of passes to WALL-E, which made me squee because I knew how much Dan has been looking forward to seeing this movie. Last night was the big night, and because it said right on the pass NO CELL PHONES I didn't bring my purse and walked into the theater empty-handed.

You always know you're watching a kids' movie when the theater smells like diapers. Luckily, Dan and I learned our lesson years ago *coughShrek2cough* and we always try to sit in the back row at a kids' movie so nobody can kick our seats. The theater we were ushered into after being WANDED (seriously, we were wanded in order to get in, I guess they're really concerned about piracy 3 days before the movie opens?) was about a 50-50 split of kids and adults. And while we were shown to the last seats in the theater, they were in the back row. Hooray!

Now, I'm not going to write a full-scale review of the movie, because Dan does that much better than I ever could. But I will say that I thoroughly enjoyed it. LOVED. Visually fantastic, aurally fantastic, and plenty in there for both kids and adults to enjoy. I might even go so far as to say it's up there in Pixar's top efforts, maybe even the best. And a good chunk of the film doesn't even have dialogue. It's that compelling, that entertaining, even without a lot of talking. And it's worth staying for the credits, because they're really cool as well. It's not often that I walk out of a theater thinking that I want to own that movie. But I plan to buy Wall-E as soon as it comes out, because I want to watch it over and over again. Go see it!

A new junkie in the neighborhood (plus, Friday links)

We found a junkie in our backyard yesterday, and I haven't laughed that hard in a long time.

Let me back up a bit. A few weeks ago we bought plants (veggies, herbs, a few shade annuals) to put in our yard and a few to put in pots. Dan thought it might be fun to get a catnip plant to keep in the house for the kitties (we'd never tried growing catnip before) as Petra loves the dried stuff. We planted all the things that needed to go in the dirt right away but it took longer to get around to putting the other things in pots. One morning I left for work and noticed the catnip plant was missing - not knocked over, not in some other part of the yard - completely and utterly missing.

My first thought was that Grey Kitty or some other neighborhood cat had taken it. Grey Kitty is a female cat that obviously lives somewhere on our block because we've seen her in other people's yards and in the alley. I have no idea where she lives (in fact, it's possible that several people consider her their kitty). She doesn't have a collar but is sleek and healthy and quite well cared-for. She also likes to torment our cats by coming in our yard and hanging out where Loki can see her. Our cats are Indoor Only and Loki is uber-alpha-male, so to have a strange kitty in his yard that he can see and hear and smell but not chase away or fight is very difficult for him. On more than one occasion, they've faced off through a window or the screen door, yowling and poofing up tails and Loki being Very Put Out that there is a strange kitty in his yard. Sometimes when I'm out in the backyard the kitties will watch me through the screen door and let me know they'd very much like me to come back inside, and they get really upset when Grey Kitty comes by and rubs against my legs. I don't pet her, but I do talk to her.

Anyhow. Later that week, Dan put the potted plants in larger pots and found the remains of the catnip plant - a clump of dirt with two sticks emerging from the top. He realized it was probably the catnip and put the dirt clump up on a little table.

Last night, while Dan was making dinner he called me to look out the back door. There was Gray Kitty, lovingly snuggling with the clump of dirt, rolling around in ecstacy on the back patio area. She looked thoroughly drugged and thoroughly pleased with herself for finding the remnants of the plant she so efficiently demolished a week or so before. I've never in my life seen a cat making love to a clump of dirt, but it's something I'm going to remember for a good long while.

And here are the best things I've found on the internet this week (both today, actually). Watch Cookie Monster face off with Steven Colbert here.

The coolest wine glasses I've ever seen. But you'd have to find the perfect wine for each glass.

Officially graduated, and a gigantic golden retriever

Due to the aforementioned difficult night (nightmares, 6 adults in one room, etc.) I woke up in a very foul mood on Sunday. Neither Dan nor I got to shower and we had only a few minutes to get dressed and ready for the graduation ceremony, since it was at 9 AM and we still had a drive ahead of us to get there. At least the stupid hotel gave us free continental breakfast, which included eggs and a good variety of other things, so I loaded up on protein-ish items to stave off blood sugar problems (I had two episodes on Saturday, both stemming from waiting too long to eat, I think). We left the hotel by 7:45 and drove up to UC Santa Barbara, finding free parking in a lot, and walking across campus to the lagoon. We passed a clock tower that had no clock (which would be what, a bell tower? It was very angular, resembling a stack of square blocks) and made our way down an expanse of lawn, finding a row of seats and saving some for the people who would be joining us (Laurel's BF, her best friend and her best friend's sister). Everything was bright and colorful in the muggy, foggy morning, flags of 31 countries flapping in the breeze, people selling garish purple orchid leis and bunches of roses and commemorative commencement programs that included the names of each graduate. I spent a while in line for the women's bathroom in one of the buildings and listened to a mom trying to convince her young daughter to use the potty. As soon as I got back to my seat, the music started and went on and on for what seemed like hours as the graduates filed in (and this was just graduates for the social science programs).

The rest of the morning went as graduations normally do. There were speeches, and more speeches, a keynote speech, tortillas were tossed by the graduates, some awards given out, and then every graduate's name was called. Laurel text messaged us to let us know when she was close to the stage so we wouldn't have to be listening for her name, and we all cheered when her name was called. Many audience members made far more noise than we did with air horns. There were more names called. And then it was all over, and the group of us met in the back corner and took photos of the new graduate. I felt extremely proud of her. Laurel held down two and sometimes three jobs throughout her four years at UCSB and graduated with a major and a minor and a respectable GPA.

We hiked back across campus in the throngs and crowds, attempting to keep the group together. Alas, as in any situation where thousands of people attempt to leave one place at the same time, traffic was horribly snarled up. We actually made it back to Laurel's house before she did (her boyfriend was first, but he bicycled back) and enjoyed the ocean view from her balcony while we waited. Finally, everyone was there, so we figured out who was going in which car and where we were going, and eventually we all made it to Laurel's boss's house where he was having a graduation party for her and two of her coworkers (all three of them UCSB grads this year). So it was an interesting party, a mix of family and friends of the three girls and the boss and his family and their GIGANTIC golden retriever named Bo who was the biggest dog I've ever seen that wasn't a great dane or a giant English mastiff. Seriously enormous. We snacked on snacks, admired the gorgeous house and yard, sipped tasty beverages, and enjoyed the afternoon, and finally all the food was grilled so then we ate that. Dan and I both ate a lot, since we knew we wouldn't be having dinner. Then there were two kinds of cake, and I could only eat a few bites because I was STUFFED.

Finally, it was time to go. Dan and I hugged everyone goodbye and climbed into the rental car and headed south on 101. It was the worst traffic I'd seen in a long time, and there was absolutely no obvious reason - no accidents, no construction. It took us an hour and a half to get to Ventura (should have been half an hour) and then we hit some more traffic a bit father south. But once we got to LA, there was no traffic at all. We made it to the rental car place three hours after we'd left Santa Barbara (good thing we left so early, is all I can say!) and there was some sort of mixup and they charged me an extra $9, so when I went back to the counter to ask them to remove the charge, they ended up only charging me for half the rental. Which was kind of surprising, but hey, I'm not going to complain. The airport was an airport, the flight was a flight, I managed a little nap and we landed safe and sound in Denver at 11:30 PM. When we got home around 1 AM, both of us decided we desperately needed showers (having never bathed since the tar incident of the day before).

Needless to say, I was a zombie on Monday. Which was why I didn't post.

Anyhow, all in all it was a good trip, if a little rushed. We didn't make it to Hearst Castle or even to the Santa Ynez valley, and I'd love to make it back to SoCal sometime in the not-too-distant future.

Victoria's Secret stole my idea

They're selling their seven-in-one jersey dress as a bridesmaid dress.

It's nearly identical to the ones I made for the wedding. Except I used nicer fabric.

Tar Babies

Our original plan was to drive north and do some wine tasting in the Santa Ynez valley (thanks for the recommendations, Slackmistress and QIR) but by the time we made it through SB we decided we weren't feeling up to it. We did drive a little ways north up the coast, enjoying the view, then turned around and went to the Santa Barbara Mission.

The restrooms at the mission have chalkboards inside with a note that says "If you must write something, please do it here" which really amused me. I got some cool photos that I am going to try to get on the internets so I won't talk about it too much now, only say that it was a neat experience, and also say that man, they really need to update some of their displays.

After we were finished at the mission, we called my sister who told us where we might find restaurants that wouldn't cost 8 arms and 6 legs like the ones on posh State Street (she directed us to Goleta, where we ended up just getting sushi and a wrap to share from Trader Joe's). We did some more TJs shopping - stocking up on chocolate supplies for us, plus buying a few things for the next day. My sister had another graduation to attend, but she told us how to get to her house (right on the beach, on Student Row in Isla Vista) and where to walk to have a nice beach experience. We dropped off some stuff at her house, carefully avoiding all of the students packing and moving (apparently, everyone has to vacate their apartments at once, during the same weekend as graduation, so the neighborhood becomes a complete madhouse, and is the only place I've ever seen someone on a bike pulling someone sitting in an office chair down the street). Up the street we walked, through a park and down a path, and found some stairs that led down to the beach.

It's been some time since I walked on the beach with no other time commitments or other things to do, and many years since I walked on a beach in Southern California (where the water is slightly less cold than in Northern California). We took off our shoes and found all kinds of treasures as we dodged large bundles of washed-up kelp, rocks, shells, and other beach detritus that helps differentiate Northern from Southern CA (all the beaches I've been to in SoCal had WAAAAY more stuff on the sand than in NorCal). We passed a large dead elephant seal, skirting around so as not to get too close, and Dan nearly stepped on a large dead fish that was missing its eye (surely the tastiest bit, we decided). We sat for a while on a sunbleached log and watched people surf, Dan snapping action shots while I made interesting shadows on the sand with my hands and a heart-shaped shell I found.

A surprising thing was the overwhelming smell of asphalt on some parts of the beach, and the tar that washed up along the shoreline. We did our best to avoid it, and saw how it covered large rocks and small pebbles, a black ugly stain on an otherwise beautiful scape. I wondered if there had been a recent oil spill as we rounded the bend and came across a rock with a piece of iron ship embedded, rust streaks dripping down the rock like paint. The rest of the beach was less interesting, and we wiggled our toes in the shallows, and then a few waves came up faster than we expected and we got a little wet around the hems of our jeans and shorts, respectively. My leg grew tired, the one that is still healing, so I asked if we could go back. We walked all the way back, stopping to inspect the iron grown into the rock once more, splashing through the water and just next to it because it was easier for my leg to walk on packed wet sand than on powdery dry. And then a wave came up and soaked the back of my jeans up to my butt. Awesome.

Past the dead fish, the tar, and the seal corpse, we climbed slowly, wetly, and sandily up the steps to the cliff, where we stopped to put on our shoes. At which point we realized the bottoms of our feet were covered in tar, despite our valiant attempts to avoid it. I had been wearing sneakers with no socks and so after I scraped what I could, I put my shoes back on, resigning them to a tar-filled afterlife. Dan had socks to go with his shoes, so he only ruined a pair of socks. As we walked back to my sister's house, my family pulled up in the Prius, having driven four adults plus luggage down 101 from the Bay Area. My mom and cousin, my sister and her fiance, all gave us hugs and joined us at Laurel's only to realize her roommate had left and Laurel was still at the other graduation. Dan and I were wet, sandy, and tarry, while my family was tired of the long drive and wanted to relax. So we drove down to Carpinteria to our hotel, through more ugly traffic.

There was some sort of mixup at the hotel that I'm still not clear about, but they doubled the price my mom was quoted and were generally nasty all around, so instead of two rooms for that night, we had to all sleep in one. Six adults. Two queen-size beds, one ridiculously small and uncomfortable pull-out couch. We lounged in the room and discovered the one good thing, three little premoistened towelettes in the bathroom labeled "tar-off" (note to hotel in Carpinteria: excellent idea!) so Dan and I were able to remove the tar from our feet. I removed my wet, salty, sandy jeans and changed into a skirt. We sat around the room for a while, the six of us, and found a place to eat dinner when Laurel and her boyfriend drove down to join us. (a passable Thai food place, at which only a few of the diners enjoyed their meals). Laurel informed me that there hadn't been an oil spill, that tar comes up naturally out of the ocean along that part of the coast, and it's pretty much impossible to avoid small particles in the sand.

After dinner, we bought a small variety of items at a liquor store, giggled over three sizes of tequila that came in the most phallic bottle I've ever seen, and retired to the hotel room for an hour or two before Laurel and her boyfriend left and the rest of us got ready for bed. Six adults in one hotel room, sharing one bathroom, good lord. Needless to say, most of us slept terribly, especially Lissa and Curtis who ended up putting the pull-out couch mattress on the floor and piling blankets on top (they were the only ones who could both fit on such a small mattress, but I understand neither of them really slept). I slept, but had nightmares all night.

Cantalope arms, and the cutest alarm clock I ever did see

(Photo of Polie, taken by Oldest Friend)
Friday afternoon we packed up some clothes and two crane mobiles and flew to Los Angeles. I'd already checked us in online and printed our boarding passes, and we weren't checking any bags, so though we had to park in the crappy long-term lot (as opposed to the slightly less crappy one), we made it to our gate with plenty of time to spare. At which time I realized I'd forgotten to bring any reading material. The in-flight magazine provided a modicum of entertainment, but there was no SkyMall catalog, and I spent the flight using whatever brain cells I seem to have left by doing the easy crossword and three of four sudoku puzzles.

We landed at LAX right on time, and then I realized I'd forgotten to do something very important, which was print out the email from travelocity telling me with which rental car company I'd reserved our vehicle. In most airports, this wouldn't matter, since they have in-airport reservation desks all near one another, or all the rental car companies in the same off-site location. So we took a gamble and took Avis's shuttle (I knew I hadn't rented with budget or hertz) but lost the gamble. They gave me a list of phone numbers to other rental car companies, but most of them didn't work. Then we got the bright idea to call someone who could get into my email to tell us which rental company it was. The trouble with this idea was that it was 5:10 PM on a Friday, Pacific time, which meant it was even later in Colorado, and everyone we knew in California would be out doing something or on the way home from work. I took a chance and called Monkey, and luckily she was at home near her computer so was able to tell us the appropriate rental company (Thrifty). So we walked the 3/4 mile to the Thrifty lot, and they gave us a Dodge Caliber, which is apparently the only small car they rent (I'd asked for their smallest car, and it felt really big to me). We headed north on the 405 freeway toward Oldest Friend's house and arrived around 6:45 PM.

Oldest Friend lives in the cutest little house that is a perfect size for one person (or two people who really, really like each other). And we immediately fell in love with her cat, who took to us right away, purring and being cute and being all tiny and such (she was the runt of the litter). We sat and relaxed for a while, and then we changed clothes and drove over to the restaurant where we met Monkey and Big Bird and Big Bird's college roommate (who was once a professional triathlete) for dinner. Everything was super tasty - the sangria, the nachos, the enormous appetizer samplers (one regular, one seafood), and by the time main dishes came out I was already full - but I did my best, and wasn't able to even touch the beans and rice that came with. It was a fabulous evening of conversation and laughter and I have to say I found Big Bird and his cantalope arms (and his college roommate) to be thoroughly charming.

We returned to OF's house and were warmly greeted by the kitty again, who did her best to convince us she should be let outside (OF had asked us to keep her in so she'd have access to her food/water over the weekend) and then she played with us and kept us company in the bed. A scant few hours later, she decided it was time for us to wake up, sitting on Dan's chest for some morning lovey time, purring in my ear and being exceedingly cute. It was 5:45 AM, and while I dozed a bit after that, we were out of bed by seven, showering and packing and getting ready to head north. We stopped at a Ralph's on our way out of town to get a few things to eat for breakfast in the car. We headed west to PCH 1 and drove north through Malibu, noting the June Gloom (a yearly phenomenon of fog/overcast/clouds during this part of the year). It was not at all warm, so our plan of stopping at a beach or two along the way seemed to be a less-than-good idea. We drove through Oxnard, toying with the idea of trying to find a comic book shop run by one of the bloggers Dan reads, but ultimately decided to keep driving north. The gloominess continued through Ventura and Carpinteria (where we hit ugly traffic) and only started to clear up once we got halfway through Santa Barbara.

I'm still sorry about your sunglasses

Seven years ago this week, I put on a purple shirt and braided my hair in two braids, bought some flowers, and took BART to the Oakland airport.

This was back when one could still meet people at the gate, so I looked at the monitor to find out where you'd be coming in, and waited. A crowd of people deplaned before you did, and I almost didn't recognize you because of how blond your goatee was. But it turned out to be you, and I gave you a hug and the flowers. My stomach did somersaults as we walked back through the airport, and I met your uncle John on our way; I guess he had come to pick up your parents? Anyhow, I didn't meet them on that trip, but your uncle John shook my hand, and then we were outside and taking the shuttle to BART.

I sat on your left side. I could see that you had a white spot in your hair, which I asked you about. You smelled good.

We made it to the BART station and waited for a train to take us to Berkeley. I was distracted, talking to you, still totally nervous, and when the train rolled into the station the train operator honked the horn. It wasn't until you pulled me back form the yellow area that I realized *I* was the reason the train had yet to pull in. You still tease me about that sometimes, when we're in the Bay Area and waiting for a BART train.

We made it back to Berkeley and you put your stuff down, and we spent the day walking all over town, me showing you the sights and you asking questions. We walked by the Campanile and, feeling daring, I bit your hand that I had been holding, gently. You didn't appear to object. I showed you around campus, and around Telegraph avenue, and around the neighborhood on the walk back down to my place. I wanted to kiss you all day, but I don't think I actually did until we were standing in my room, glass french doors wide open. It was a really good kiss; my knees ended up buckling a little bit.

I sewed a button back on your nice pants, which you changed into because you had to attend your Grandfather's memorial service. I told you how to get back to BART, which train to get on, but I found out later you were so twitterpated you'd taken a train in the wrong direction and ended up far later to the service than you expected to be. That night, I went to my cousin's birthday party in the city, but I was really distracted, thinking about you coming back to stay with me after both our social obligations were completed. I already missed you, and I'd only spent a few hours in your presence.

We both made it back to my place at some point, you driven by your brother (I think) and you slept in my bed. My head fit perfectly in the crook of your arm, on your chest. It was the best sleep I'd had in ages.

The next morning, we were standing in the kitchen. Maybe I made you breakfast, or we both cooked, or QIR cooked, or Bequi - I can't remember. But I do remember that you came up behind me, hooked my arms in yours behind my back, and leaned against me - an embrace I'd never had before, but one that felt familiar, comforting. That day we took BART again, into the city to spend some time at the Haight Street Fair. The photo I took of you and QIR waiting for the train, she in a straw hat, you with a gigantic grin, still hangs in my cubicle. I look at it every day. You still had an earring then, and something boyish about your face. We made it to Haight street and it was a complete madhouse, a situation neither of us relishes. Too many people, too close together, and I felt bad for subjecting you to a great part of the city under such unideal circumstances. We bought ice cream at Ben and Jerry's and walked off Haight a bit to eat. QIR got ice cream all over her face. I could hardly eat for thinking that you'd soon be flying back to Colorado.

We took the train back across to the East Bay, and you left your new prescription sunglasses, which were really expensive. You just left them on the seat, and I didn't think to make sure we'd all grabbed everything. But six and a half years later I would do the same thing with my camera in Italy, so I think we both need to start looking out for each other's belongings on trains; we don't have such good luck with that.

I think QIR drove us to the airport, and I kissed you goodbye. My heart was in my throat as we drove home. I wouldn't see you again for another month, and by then we'd already have decided we were officially together, in a relationship. July 3 is the day we say is our anniversary, but I think of that first weekend trip, during which we spent the entire time together (aside from the memorial service), as an important time as well. It's the day we met in person, finally, after spending months on the phone and IMing with each other. It's the day I knew my feelings for you had a basis in truth rather than fantasy. It's the day you gave up watching Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals in which your hockey team beat the other hockey team to win the cup and you didn't even tell me you wanted to watch the game, because you decided you'd rather spend the time with me, and I didn't know until years later what a big deal it was to you.

Happy meet-a-versary, Dan. I love you very much. *vapt*

Then again, maybe not

After I posted yesterday I started actually researching the trip to San Simeon from LA and discovered that it's a lot more difficult than I initially thought. I had remembered it being just north of SB, but it's in fact 150 miles up the coast. And we'll be driving up from LA, so it's 250 miles north of LA. That's at least $50 in gas just to get there, plus another $50 to get back to LA on Sunday, plus the cost of the tour ($24 each), plus we'd have to leave LA at oh-dark-thirty to get up there in time to take a two hour tour and drive back down to SB in time to do anything.

I walked home with a heavy heart yesterday afternoon, and told Dan the bad news. He immediately said, "OK, not this trip." And I felt really bad, because we'll be closer to San Simeon than we've been in years, but won't be able to afford (either time or money) the trip. Wah.

So instead, I need to come up with some other ideas for adventures to have in and around the LA/SB area (or just slightly north of SB, but not 150 miles north). Anyone in the Southern CA area have any suggestions? Wineries, places of interest, the best place to see marine mammals? I know very little about the stretch between LA and SB, having only driven it once in the dark in January 2003. Any suggestions welcome.

Disappointment, Contentment, Anticipation

We've seen two big summer movies so far (Iron Man and Indiana Jones), and the big summer movie I was really looking forward to seeing was Prince Caspian. So this weekend, we made a date to pay 8 bucks for a MATINEE, good lord, and headed down to the local Theater that Shows Big Movies on the 16th street mall Sunday afternoon because we'd heard it wasn't doing terribly well and might be gone from theaters soon. After being more than pleasantly surprised by the first one, I was really looking forward to seeing what they did with book two.

Unfortunately, my excitement was short-lived. The movie was not what I was hoping it would be, and though it's been many years since I read the book, I think they took quite a few more liberties with the story than I might have liked. One of my favorite parts of the movie didn't actually even happen in the book, and they were far more heavy-handed (in my opinion) on the religious undertones than they were in the first movie. I left the theater feeling like I'd seen an entertaining movie, but it wasn't what I had wanted to see. Not that I consider myself a fanboy or anything, but it's always a bummer when you walk away disappointed. If they make a movie of book 3 (Voyage of the Dawn Treader), I hope it's better. Prince Caspian did not live up to The Lion, The Witch, and the Wardrobe.

The rest of the weekend, however, was lovely. There was some relaxing and some chore-doing and two delicious breakfasts, shoe shopping but no buying, and we planned to grill outside but the weather didn't cooperate on Saturday or Sunday (too windy, not warm enough) (we tried again last night and the damn coals just wouldn't light despite direct flame for several minutes. We just need a better grill I guess, but we made do with the George Foreman). On Sunday, we made our way through the People's Fair on our way to and from the movies, and while it is generally interesting to watch people and gawk at merchandise and sniff overpriced food smells, there was nothing particularly camera-worthy (though in the car on Saturday we did see the best yard sale sign ever, with its perfect message of STUFF and an arrow pointing right, and I wished I'd had my camera with me). As Dan remarked, PrideFest is more interesting for people watching, and the Taste of Colorado is more worthwhile to consume overpriced food, so maybe we'll try again later in the summer.

I also knitted a baby hat for the baby who was still in utero last Saturday; she was born on Thursday the 5th and hadn't been named yet, so I whipped up a cute hat real quick in the baby yarn I had left over from other projects, and I'll give it to Julie in a day or two to bring to the new parents. I knitted the hat while we watched the Bourne Ultimatum (less confusing than Matt Damon Kills People and Runs Around A Lot II) and while we watched the Goonies (Sean Astin was my first confirmed crush; when I saw that movie I totally swooned, and I was only like six) and I finished it up on Sunday morning while breakfast cooked (that, and finally finished Monkey's giftmas/birthday present that I will be bringing with me this weekend).

Because hooray! We are going to Southern California this weekend to witness my little sister's college graduation (what does one wear to a graduation at 9 AM on a Sunday in a beach town?) We fly in and out of LAX, will be driving up the coast on Saturday, and making a stop at San Simeon because I've owed Dan a trip to Hearst Castle since he moved me to Colorado in January of 2003. I'm not sure what else we might do; perhaps just have an adventure and make some stops along the way up. I'm excited because we get to meet Oldest Friend's cat (unfortunately, OF will not be in town, but we get to stay at her house anyway) and because we get to hang out with Monkey and Big Bird and (I have heard tell) some other people as well on Friday night. A Friday night! Out in a big city! It should be a smashing good time. Oh, and we'll spend part of Saturday doing beachy things, and getting to spend time with my family, and I bet there will be something fun to do on Saturday night in Santa Barbara. Plus, after the graduation on Sunday we're having a party for my sister who is leaving for a 3-week trip to Ireland right afterward, so that should be fun too.

Ethics

This week, a very disturbing thing happened.

A local Major Newspaper decided to put a link to a huge database on their front page. This database contained the names, titles, agencies, and salaries of the people who are employed by the State of Colorado. This was not done as a part of a story, or an expose, or with any sort of analysis involved. When asked by multiple people why they had chosen to do this (particularly, why they had chosen to publish names and not just job titles/positions), they responded, "Because we can." The paper feels that "taxpayers need to know where their money is going."

Yes, my salary and the salaries of all state employees in this state are a matter of public record (because we are civil servants). However, there is a process through which one must generally go in order to obtain this information (the process the newspaper went through). Now this information is available for anyone to see with the click of a button, whether that be a future employer, an identity thief, or a coworker with a grudge. It is extremely easy to use this information for the detriment of the employees involved. For example, there is only one ME employed by the state (there is only one ME in the country, as far as I have been able to ascertain). Not that I care all that much if someone wants to know how much I make (it's not that much, I can assure you), but it still feels like an invasion of privacy. And the exact same purpose could have been accomplished had the paper chosen to publish this information without the names of the individuals, without any of the risks involved.

Take people who are employed by the state and in the legal or correctional industries. What about criminals with grudges? Or people who have taken pains to hide themselves from ex-husbands or wives, people who may have a valid reason to be afraid someone can find them? I can think of any number of scenerios in which the publication of this information could be very damaging to the state employee. Also, life becomes more difficult for the employers of people who can, at the touch of a button, find out how much their coworkers make. And use this bargaining chip. Or people once employed by the state who wish to switch to private employment. How convenient that they no longer have the means with which to bargain for a future salary, because the employer can easily see how much the person currently makes (or made).

The most amusing part to me, in all this fucked-upedness, is that from what I understand much of this data is incorrect. I haven't looked to see if what they say I make is actually what I make, but several of my fellow state employees have reported inaccuracies. And best of all? A large percentage of state employees (which includes people employed at universities, etc.) don't even get paid with state taxpayer funds, but grants, federal funds, or other funding streams which don't involve the state general fund at all. Like my salary, for example, is paid for by the program I run, not the good citizens of this state. Yet my information is (I assume) out there for anyone to see.

We were informed that this information was going to be published about fifteen minutes before the fact, and had absolutely no say in the decision to make this information so easily acessible. Even if the newspaper took it down, it's out there in cyberspace; someone has already copied it for who knows what purpose, I am sure.

Just because you CAN do something, doesn't mean you SHOULD. I have no idea what the fallout from this decision could be, but I'm going to be keeping an eye on my credit reports. And I will never again contribute any money to this newspaper or its sister paper. I fail to see what makes including employees' names so important to this data set; the exact same purpose could have been accomplished without names and there would have been no repercussions for state employees. Shame on you, Major Metropolitan Newspaper.

How I know it's summer

The heady ubiquity of lilac in the air has given way
To drifts of tree sperm, deposited by the honey locusts
Broad-leafed catalpas bloom
Ruffled flamenco skirts, modest purple freckles, garish yellow pollen
Distant thunder rumbles, the mountains emerge from snowy winter sleep,
Loudly airing their disagreements with the warm prairie air
And bad television
Good thing there's netflix

Healthy cake, about to pop, come get yer lik's!

This weekend was quite lovely, both in weather and activities. It was nice to have a weekend that we neither had company nor were company, a couple of days to just do what we felt like doing and enjoying ourselves (with some errands etc. mixed in, of course). We sat in the backyard in the warm shade and read books; we completely restocked our liquor supply (were out of EVERYTHING); we spent way too much money on plants for our garden (mostly vegetables, a few flowering annuals) and put the garden in, finally.

On Friday, I asked our friend Julie what kind of cake she wanted for her birthday. We threw around ideas, and, knowing she's on some sort of fancy diet, I wanted to make sure I made something that would a) taste good, and b) not make her feel extraordinarily guilty for eating it. She asked for chocolate, zucchini, and booze to be involved in the production of the cake. I went to allrecipes and typed in those ingredients (plus cake) and came up with this recipe. However, I knew it needed to be modified to be made healthier. Here's what I came up with.

MLE's awesome Chocolate Zucchini Rum Cake, now with Less Guilt!
3/4 cup butter
1 1/3 cup brown sugar
3 eggs
2 1/4 cups grated zucchini
1/3 cup Sailor Jerry's rum (that's the kind we buy, I'm sure it would be fine with any rum)
1 2/3 cup all-purpose flour
2/3 plus a little bit wheat flour
1/2 cup chopped walnuts and pecans
1 cup chocolate chips
1/2 dark unsweetened cocoa powder (I use this stuff, it is terrific)
1 1/2 tsp baking soda
1 1/2 tsp baking powder
1 1/2 tsp salt
1 tsp ground cinnamon

1 cup powdered sugar
2 oz Sailor Jerry's rum

I accidentally omitted the milk from the original recipe but discovered it wasn't necessary (the batter was plenty moist) and probably could have even left out some of the butter. I used a 9x13 pan rather than a bundt pan because we don't have a bundt pan, plus I knew there would be a lot of people at the party and it's easier to divide up a sheet cake into lots of pieces.

We got all gussied up for the party, which was held at a swanky local establishment (so swanky the drinks were $8-9 EACH, good thing I had planned to only have two) and walked the 8 short blocks and 4 long blocks, me tottering in four-inch heels and carrying the cake in arms, Dan carrying my wrap and his jacket. A great time was had by all, but, best of all, the cake was a huge hit. Julie cut it up into about 28 pieces so everyone could have some and everybody who tried it must have complimented me. Seriously, it turned out SOOO GOOD, and you couldn't tell at all that it had zucchini in it (or that it was made with partly wheat flour, or that I'd cut the sugar nearly in half, etc.) I plan to make this cake again, only this time I'll use parchment paper in the bottom of the pan (it was so moist that a few bits stuck to the pan rather than holding cohesively, but since I iced it in drizzles and the venue was dark, it didn't matter).

I love going to events that are Julie-centric, because she has a lot of friends who I like very much, some of whom I have known almost as long as I've known Julie (about 5 years now), so it's fun to catch up with people. Like Chu, the Brazillian goddess who just got back from 6 months traveling around the world, who also plays Capoeira. I enjoyed the company for a couple of hours, but at one point the place got really loud because they were showing some sort of fight on the television and it was a little overwhelming. Luckily, things quieted back down once the fight was over. I started to feel like I wanted to leave at one point, until I learned that Julie's cousin and his wife were on their way, so we decided to stay and say hi to them (having met them at Julie events through their engagement and wedding and decision to become Orthodox over the last few years). The female half of the couple was exceedingly pregnant, having been told by her midwife that she'd probably have the baby over the weekend. Yet she and her husband made it to two social events in one night. Go, them! She looked great and I am really excited to find out what flavor of baby they have and what his or her name will be.

Because we were up so late Saturday night, we slept in on Sunday and didn't finish with our breakfast of waffles-from-scratch, strawberries, and turkey bacon until nearly 11 AM. We had decided to experiment with a new sweetener, maple syrup being prohibitively expensive these days and regular syrup being rife with HFCS, so we bought Agave Nectar at the grocery store on Saturday. Turns out I like it better than maple syrup, plus it's marginally healthier (has a lower glycemic index) and far less expensive. Hooray! We bought our plants and other necessities (bags of poop and bark and dirt) and spent the afternoon planting everything. I have high hopes for the zucchini plant I put in, since now I have a great food processor that grates in like 2 seconds and a fabulous new zucchini recipe.

We never ate lunch, opting instead for a early (for us) dinner of homemade hummus, falafel, veggies, and pita, and then we walked to our neighborhood ice cream store. It turned out that everyone else in a 3-mile radius had the exact same idea, so we waited in line for a half hour for our child-size chai tea and billionaires (me) and chocolate peanut butter in a sugar cone (Dan). It was nearly full dark by the time we got home, enjoying a leisurely stroll in the warm June evening.

I couldn't have asked for a better weekend.