SumoGodzilla Wedding, Part 2: Everyone needs a Night of Discovery

Immediately following the ceremony, L&C went and took some more photos, while everyone else mingled and the catering staff moved all the chairs inside so people could sit down. Lissa had done a seating chart (rather than escort cards) and everyone managed to figure out where they were supposed to sit. The centerpieces consisted of a potted orchid and a jar of chocolate-covered mint patties, and each table (0-10) had a photo of Lissa and Curtis at that age. I think people had fun going from table to table looking at the photos; they put a lot of work into that project!

So now, I explain the sumo-godzilla thing. Several years ago, L&C found one of those plywood painted face cutout things, and took a photo of themselves - Curtis as the sumo wrestler and Lissa as Godzilla. During wedding planning, they decided to structure the wedding around this theme (with some orchids thrown in for good measure) and lots of the little details involved sumo and godzilla - the ties, the sumo cufflinks, the cake toppers. (Yes, that is a small piece of paper towel taped to Godzilla's head.) The intro to their wedding website featured an animation of Sumo fighting Godzilla that Dan put together for them. And they recreated the sumo-godzilla photo cutout thing (cardboard, not plywood, handpainted by Lissa), and used it as the backdrop for their DIY photo guestbook (also starring a new polaroid product that spits out a photo taken by a digital camera), so guests took photos as Sumo or Godzilla and pasted them in the guestbook along with their signatures. And speaking of the guestbook, I mentioned that Dan handmade it, and by that I meant that he REALLY handmade it - all of the paper was made by Dan, and it was hand-bound, the cover was made, the letterpress was done, and the drawings inside were done by Dan. I think it turned out really nicely.




I digress. So while L&C were taking "We just got married" photos with each other, people started to take sumogodzilla photos, and mingle, and drink wine and beer and other refreshing beverages. I got a chance to talk more with my Dad's-side-of-family relatives and hug some people I'd last seen at our wedding (granted, it was only 5 months ago, but I hardly ever see them). I posed for more photos. By that time it was REALLY hot outside unless you were in the shade, so people mostly stuck to the shady spots or hung out indoors to wait. Horse's ovaries were passed. More mingling happened. Simon, as the emcee, got the music going and asked everyone to be seated when the caterers started putting out lunch, and I chatted with my mom's-side relatives with whom we were seated, waving at Leah and Simon the next table over.

There was eating, and there was visiting, and little girls and cute babies playing on the floor, and there was prosecco (or sparkling cider) poured into champagne flutes, and Laurel and Sam toasted the bride and groom. Then, they cut the cake, and they danced their first dance for a minute, then invited others up to join them. I danced in my heeled brown sandals for the first time since I hurt my leg, and for a while it was OK. The best part of the dancing, aside from dancing with my husband, was the (now) traditional set of movements to the Proclaimers' I'm Gonna Be (500 Miles), and this time more people joined in. And at one point, I had to fix Lissa's hair because it started to come undone. Don't ask me why she looks so horrified.

Lissa had asked us to keep the dancing going, which we tried to do, but it was so hot. I had to escape outside for a few minutes, while cake was cut and passed out, and when I came back in there were no more slices or plates or a knife for cutting, so I had to find someone in the kitchen to cut more. Harumph, I said to that. But the cake was exceptionally good, so it was worth the hassle. Then, those of us in the bridal party were whisked up to the highest part of the park (Inspiration Point) to take a few more group shots, and when we got back the party was over. The place where the wedding was held has two events a day on summer weekends, so everyone was booted out at 3 PM.



After everything was packed and loaded up, Dan drove us (plus some stuff) down to Leah and Simon's, who followed with some of the potted orchids (they volunteered to take care of them while L&C were on the honeymoon) and the remains of the full sheet cake. We put it in their extra fridge, where it juuuuust fit, and everyone relaxed for a while and took off their fancy clothes. I took a brief nap. Then, it was time to load back up and head for the afterparty, held at a neighborhood pool/poohouse in Orinda. At the party we saw a slideshow created by Curtis's dad, we ate pizza, we drank sangria, Dan swam in the pool, and I marveled at how utterly exhausted I was. It was kind of ridiculous. My energy was gone, and everyone else at the party seemed to have unlimited amounts of the stuff, even the little kids and the pregnant lady. Laurel and her friends came up with a drink they named the Night of Discovery*, consisting of blueberry vodka and sprite, I think. It was a little sweet for me.



Apparently, after we left, there was a (root beer) keg stand and a cake fight, but I was long asleep by that point. And Lissa and Curtis headed off to a fancy hotel (a gift from Laurel and Jackie) for their night of discovery.*



* One of Curtis's coworkers spent the nearly two years of their engagement telling him about the wedding night and what it would entail. He called it the "night of discovery." Curtis initially thought he was joking, but apparently he was dead serious (and also didn't know L&C had lived together for their entire relationship). So after Curtis told us about it, people spent the entire wedding week/weekend teasing them about it.

Thanks to Dan, Leah, and Laurel for the photos

Food meme, courtesy Great Big Nerd

Courtesy the dude I married, originating from Very Good Taste.

The rules are pretty standard:
A. List of 100 items
B. Italicize items you’ve eaten
C. Cross out items you’d never consider eating


1. Venison I rarely eat mammal, but I might make an exception for venison
2. Nettle tea
3. Huevos Rancheros
4. Steak tartare I don't eat raw mammal
5. Crocodile
6. Black pudding ew
7. Cheese fondue
8. Carp
9. Borscht
10. Baba ghanoush Sadly, I'm allergic to eggplant
11. Calamari
12. Pho mmm, pho
13. PB&J sandwich
14. Aloo gobi
15. Hot dog from a street cart not unless it's turkey
16. Epoisses
17. Black truffle
18. Fruit wine made from something other than grapes
19. Steamed pork buns Had 'em back in my mammal-eating days
20. Pistachio ice cream
21. Heirloom tomatoes
22. Fresh wild berries
23. Foie gras
24. Rice and beans
25. Brawn, or head cheese
26. Raw Scotch Bonnet pepper Medium salsa is my heat limit
27. Dulce de leche
28. Oysters
29. Baklava Loooves me some baklava
30. Bagna cauda This sounds really good!
31. Wasabi peas
32. Clam chowder in a sourdough bowl
33. Salted lassi
34. Sauerkraut
35. Root beer float
36. Cognac with a fat cigar I smoke nothing and like it.
37. Clotted cream tea
38. Vodka jelly/Jell-O
39. Gumbo
40. Oxtail
41. Curried goat
42. Whole insects
43. Phaal - though it would probably really hurt
44. Goat’s milk
45. Malt whisky from a bottle worth £60/$120 or more
46. Fugu
47. Chicken tikka masala
48. Eel
49. Krispy Kreme original glazed doughnut
50. Sea urchin
51. Prickly pear
52. Umeboshi - I had something like this in China, but it wasn't umeboshi.
53. Abalone
54. Paneer
55. McDonald’s Big Mac Meal
56. Spaetzle
57. Dirty gin martini - I would try it but I wouldn't like it
58. Beer above 8% ABV
59. Poutine
60. Carob chips Bleah
61. S’mores
62. Sweetbreads
63. Kaolin I thought this was clay?
64. Currywurst
65. Durian
66. Frogs’ legs
67. Beignets, churros, elephant ears or funnel cake
68. Haggis I find it highly unlikely I'd ever eat haggis willingly
69. Fried plantain
70. Chitterlings, or andouillette I've had chicken andouille sausage, does this count?
71. Gazpacho
72. Caviar and blini
73. Louche absinthe
74. Gjetost, or brunost
75. Roadkill
76. Baijiu Not sure if we had this in China or not
77. Hostess Fruit Pie
78. Snail There's a story behind this one. Perhaps one day I will blog it.
79. Lapsang souchong
80. Bellini
81. Tom yum
82. Eggs Benedict I'm not big on hollandaise sauce.
83. Pocky
84. Tasting menu at a three-Michelin-star restaurant.
85. Kobe beef
86. Hare
87. Goulash
88. Flowers
89. Horse
90. Criollo chocolate
91. Spam unless I would really offend someone if I didn't eat it.
92. Soft shell crab
93. Rose harissa Sounds yummy!
94. Catfish
95. Mole poblano
96. Bagel and lox
97. Lobster Thermidor
98. Polenta
99. Jamaican Blue Mountain coffee Coffee is gross.
100. Snake

Is it me? You be the judge.

Eh.

Sumo-Godzilla Wedding, part 1: or, how I gained a second brother in one year

August 2nd dawned dark and early.

Actually, it's kind of hard to tell when you're in the Bay Area in the summer, because it's nearly always overcast that early in the morning. How early, you ask? After nearly 5 hours of sleep I rolled out of bed at 6:30, tiptoed down the stairs, brushed my teeth, checked my email and updated my Facebook status, and attempted to leave Leah and Simon's house in order to drive to my sister's in time to do her hair. Except the screen door wouldn't open, so I had to wake Simon up. Boo.

So I got to Lissa's house around 7:15 and everyone was awake, or as awake as most of them can be at that time of the day (none of them are morning people). As I said, it was overcast, so there was still some dismay over the possibility of the wedding being cold rather than warm. Staying in their house were L&C, Laurel and her friend Lindsay, and Jackie, the awesomest ER nurse evah, and so as you might imagine, things were a little crazy. Someone put the Princess Bride on the TV, and someone handed me a caffinated sody pop when I asked for one, and there was a parade of showers and people pouring coffee and I plugged in the curling iron and started on Lissa's hair. Because her hair is even thicker than mine, I knew it would take a while to get it all curled so I could start to style it, so I had Lissa sitting in a chair in a daze by about 7:40 as everyone else fluttered around.

Due to some practice earlier in the week, I knew exactly how I'd be doing Lissa's hair, so once it was curled it didn't take long. I sprayed the heck out of it and hoped it would hold with only small bobby pins - in our family, with our thick hair, we usually need the big ones, but the amount of hair that was pinned wasn't especially big, so I was hoping it would hold OK. I shoved in the two pearl hairpins that had belonged to my maternal grandmother to help camoflage some of the bobby pins, and Lissa's hair was ready to go. I sat in the kitchen to do my makeup, hand mirror propped against a box on the table so I could see, because the bathroom mirror and living room mirror were full of primping ladies.

At various times throughout the morning, a parade of people stopped by the house to assist in transporting things like all the wine and beer and prosecco, the champagne flutes, the 15 potted orchids, the elements for the table settings, and a large cardboard cutout with Godzilla and a Sumo wrestler on it (more on that later). My mom arrived and was put to work ironing shirts and wraps. I put on my bm dress (a little tight in the boobs, but fit OK otherwise) and did something very simple with my hair, and stopped in the middle of something to apply Lissa's eyeliner when requested (tightlining using a dark brown eyeshadow, which I think looks much nicer than a pencil) after Jackie and Laurel had done the rest of her makeup. Jackie filed my obscenely long nails down in a square shape and I gave myself the quickest French manicure ever, and immediately smudged it when helping Jackie to tie her dress. Someone put makeup on Curtis (don't ask me why, but there is photographic evidence). The groomsmen who hadn't been at the rehearsal dinner came over to get their ties (silkscreened with sumo wrestlers) and one of them had a large hole in the back of his pants, which I fixed with about 6 safety pins. And suddenly we all had to leave, and so we piled into three cars, Lissa with her dress, veil, purse (with vows) in hand, and headed up to the Brazil Room in Tilden Park.

I didn't know where I was going, since I'd never driven up there from the part of the East Bay where L&C live, and the drive was far more challenging than I expected - lots of twists and turns on super narrow streets undergoing construction, trying to follow someone who knew where he was going but wanted to drive way faster than I did. On the drive up, it became clear that the fog was going to burn off completely, and then someone realized that the tie for the remaining groomsman might have been left at their house, so Lissa switched cars and Curtis drove home to get the offending piece of formalwear. We made it to the location in time for Lissa to get her dress on before the photographers arrived (10 AM), and people immediately went into action, arranging centerpieces on the tables, setting up SumoGodzilla and the camera and the guestbook that Dan made them, helping Lissa with her dress and getting her veil in the right spot, and visiting with each other. I managed to find everyone on whom I needed to pin flowers (8 men, 6 women) and eventually the last bridesmaid (Curtis's sister) arrived so we each picked a BM bouquet (each one was different, and all had elements similar to Lissa's bouquet). I ended up with the one I liked best, and I think everyone's bouquets went best with their dresses, even though I didn't plan it that way.

More guests arrived as we started taking formal photos, and it got brighter and hotter as the morning went on. The fog had burned off completely, so it was actually much more comfortable indoors than outside where we were taking photos. Leah and Simon arrived with the PA system and Dan just in the nick of time, as he was supposed to be in some of the photos. More people arrived. It got hotter. People started to seat themselves on the shady side of the ceremony space. Nobody seated themselves on the sunny side except people who'd thought ahead and brought umbrellas to shade themselves. And then it was time for us to gather inside and discuss the order in which we'd be walking out, since we hadn't had any sort of rehearsal the day before. Dan escorting Mom, officiant, flower girls, every other groomsman and bridesmaid, and then Lissa and Curtis walking arm in arm up to the front of the group to say their vows.




So that's what we did. Some of us grinned. Some of us cried. Some of us did both (me! though I managed not to let any tears actually fall out of my eyes). And then, suddenly, after all this time, they were married.

It was time to party.

photos by Dan, Leah, someone with Lissa's camera, and Laurel

My top 3 bodily fluid encounters in big cities, for Jive Turkey

Yeah, yeah, I'm still going to write about the wedding. But this is far more amusing! Over at Jive Turkey, she recently wrote about all the things she loves and disloves about NYC, and mentioned the high rate of encounters with other people's bodily fluids. Which reminded me about MY encounters with bodily fluids in public places in big cities. And so I have some stories to tell.

MLE's Top 3 (in terms of bizarreness, I guess) stories of Encountering Other People's Bodily Fluids in Big Cities

#3. Was it pee? Was it amniotic fluid? Only her hairdresser knows for sure.

Once upon a time, I worked at a Really Big Corporate Law Firm in San Francisco. The firm had space on several floors of a big highrise building right downtown, only 2 blocks from the Montgomery BART station, and on the ground floor of the building was this huge gorgeous atrium area with tables and chairs, open to the public. You had to flash a badge to security in order to get upstairs in the elevator, but anyone and everyone could hang out in the glass-walled atrium and enjoy any sun that came through the San Francisco fog during regular business hours. Lots of people, including me, tended to eat lunch here on cold-but-sunny days, since it was climate-controlled, but you never knew what you might see. One day I had gone out with a friend to grab some lunch at a place nearby, and when we walked back in the building a large woman in her 30s (I don't even remember what she looked like, other than she was wearing voluminous clothing and smelled bad) entered the building and yelled out something incomprehensible. All the people in her immediate vicinity shrank back, and a security guard came over to speak with her, or perhaps to escort her right back outside (you never know about people wandering in off the street in San Francisco). All of a sudden, a large splash of liquid sort of started emanating from her feet and it covered the floor in a big puddle. I wasn't close enough to tell whether said liquid had any color (it was a slate floor), and because of the nature of the woman's size and clothing, it was impossible for me to tell whether she was pregnant and her water broke or whether she just decided to pee all over herself. Either way, it was rather entertaining and broke up my monotonous day of running Lexis Nexis searches.

#2 There are some things that do not need photographic evidence

I went on a big, multi-country six-week-long trip to Europe after college. It was one of the best experiences of my life. I saw a lot of crazy things on that trip, but the best story (in my opinion) was when I went to Prague. I stayed in a hostel with a bunch of other people, all of whom were traveling alone, so one night we were hanging out in the common room and chatting, and all decided we'd go out to a club and go dancing together. Before we left, however, one of the people who had been there a few days told us that the staff would prepare and sell shots of absinthe. You know, the whole show, with the sugar in the spoon and the lighting on fire and whatnot. This was back in 2000, when you couldn't really get absinthe very many places, and I wanted to try it. So I did. I had one shot of absinthe and it was far more intoxicating than I had expected (incidentally, I had occasion to try it again last summer, just one shot, and again I experienced a different kind of intoxication than with any other alcohol I've had. Also, it tastes gross.) The one shot was more than plenty for me.

Anyhow, so we were hanging out, and this one kind of annoying guy decided to join our group. Most of us weren't really up to doing much partying, but he wanted to get his drink on, I guess, so before we left the hostel he had FOUR shots of absinthe. Now, I don't know how many of my readers have ever tried this beverage, but ONE shot of absinthe was nearly enough to knock me out. Granted, I'm not one who generally holds a lot of liquor or anything, but sheesh. FOUR. Eventually, it was late enough to consider going out to a club, so we all (probably 8 or 10 of us) ventured out into the foggy Prague night and went down some dark stairs into a place that was recommended by the hostel staff. On the way, we passed by an ice cream cart selling Magnum bars (kind of like a popsicle made of ice cream but not covered in chocolate) and the annoying guy bought one and wolfed it down. So we got to the place, and it was bumping, and we all danced for a while, and eventually the annoying guy came over to me and told me he had THREE more shots of absinthe (bringing his grand total to SEVEN) and he wasn't feeling especially well, and could I help him get outside? I guess I was the most approachable of the group (the rest being mostly independently traveling guys) and I wanted some fresh air so I escorted Drunken Magnum Bar Eating Annoying Guy up the stairs.

He promptly vomited all over the place, including on his socked- and birkenstocked feet. It was white.

Then he pulled his camera out of his pocket and took a photo of it.

I decided to remove myself from the sticky situation and went back down into the club, but the group was pretty much ready to go so we all headed back to the hostel. On the way, some gypsies (and by this, I mean probably Roma but possibly any manner of other people who act this way) surrounded Annoying Guy and tried to take his wallet but we chased them off. When we got back to the hostel, most of us headed to bed, but Annoying Guy tried to get us to go out with him to another club in some other part of the city. I'm pretty sure everyone blew him off.

I had to get up early the next morning to catch a train, and I went into the common room to get my free breakfast (museli and yogurt and hot chocolate), when who should I find but Annoying Guy. From the looks/smell of him, he'd never gone to bed or showered. Which meant he hadn't changed his clothes, or his shoes or socks, and he still appeared to be drunk. Gross.

#1 Why that Thai restaurant hosed down their sidewalk every morning

As many of you know, I used to live in Berkeley, CA. I lived one block away from one of the busiest intersections in the whole city (University and Shattuck) above some small shops, and I had to walk a couple of blocks to the BART station each day on my way to work. I noticed that the Thai restaurant on that first block always hosed down their sidewalk, as it was wet every day whether or not it had rained. On the same corner where I lived but on the other side of the street, a blind, presumably homeless guy, would bring a folding chair and a radio and sit in the same spot every day, all day long, swaying back and forth to any music that came out of the radio. I never spoke to him, and he seemed pretty harmless, but I didn't pay all that much attention. When you live in Berkeley long enough, you see the same homeless/beggars in the same places all the time, so they're part of the landscape.

One day I was going to the movies with the Chef and my sister (and maybe someone else, I forget). We were going to see O Brother, Where Art Thou, and I was super excited about it. Everyone met at my house to walk downtown to the theater, and just before we passed the blind guy in the chair he stood up right in front of us, walked several steps down the sidewalk (to right in front of the Thai place), pulled down his pants, and had explosive diarrhea all over the sidewalk. Like, 10 feet away from us. And he just pulled up his pants and walked back to his chair like nothing had happened.

You haven't lived until a blind homeless man has taken an explosive diarrhea crap right in front of you. And then pulled his pants up and sat back down.

That day, I learned why the Thai place hosed down their sidewalk every morning. I assume the guy just used it as his personal toilet whenever he felt the need.

Fantasy evening

This is how it was supposed to happen:

My sister and her new husband flew into Denver at 8 PM last night with a four-hour layover before their red-eye flight to San Jose, Costa Rica. Dan and I picked them up at the airport and we drove into town to have dinner at a tasty Mexican place that's open late. They brought a few things I'd left behind at their place (all my makeup, for instance) and it worked out so conveniently. We drove them back to the airport in plenty of time for their midnight flight to kick off their honeymoon, and went home ourselves and ate ice cream in our newly cooled-down house.

This is how it actually happened:

My sister called me 40 minutes before their flight was even supposed to board yesterday afternoon to tell me their flight was listed as delayed, but with no idea as to how long. A few minutes later she called again to tell me the official delay was TWO HOURS.

TWO HOURS.

So we went grocery shopping after I got home from work, and she called me again to give me an official ETA on their flight: 9:51 PM. Obviously, there would be no time for going to dinner, and (not expecting their flight to be delayed two hours) she had brought my stuff with them. Which we had to go get, because they didn't want to haul a pair of my jeans and my makeup all the way to Costa Rica and back! So we drove out to the airport last night, waited for them to tell us they were off the plane, met Curtis at the passenger pickup area, and gave him some sandwiches and snacks we'd made for them so they wouldn't starve (not much is open at 10 PM at the airport). It cost us an hour and a half of travel/wait time and probably 5 bucks in gas, but at least I have my stuff and they got some food and by now they are on a jeep somewhere in the wilds of Costa Rica. I hope they have fun.

I went to California for a week and I need another week to recover

First, my sister and Curtis got themselves all marrified. Yay! I will write a wedding post, maybe tomorrow, because holy cow, people have already put up like 500 photos on their flickr site and they just got married on Saturday.

Second, while I enjoyed doing everything that I did, I never want to work in the wedding industry. Three weddings in 12 months was hard enough, I can't imagine doing it all the time. Maybe it's different if you're getting paid for it, I dunno.

So. I flew to Oakland on Saturday the 26th (at night) after a busy day of errand running (post office, pharmacy, fabric store) and purse-finishing and packing. My sister and her almost-husband picked me up at the airport, and when we got to their house I got to work on my first task - making some fake flowers Lissa had gotten into hair wreaths for their flower girls.

Sunday, we (and by we, I mean my family) threw a suprise birthday party for Lissa (her birthday was the 30th). She thought she would be attending a coed shower but didn't know anything else. A good time was had by all 16 people and I hope it was nice for her to have some birthday-oriented time rather than wedding time (my birthday this year was all but swallowed by wedding prep; I even kind of forgot I was having one) since it was my idea that the party be a surprise bday shindig and not a shower. We had salads and pizza and tasty beverages (Jupiter's sells a very lovely pomegranate hard cider) and my mom made a chocolate cake. After the party, we went back to their house and worked on wedding stuff.

Monday I woke up in abject misery. My neck went out again, and I have no idea why, but it hurt like a mofo and made things much more difficult because there were a lot of projects and errands I was intending to help with that I just couldn't. Lissa got their rings cleaned and bought some makeup at Benefit, and Laurel and I tagged along. We got some food at Trader Joe's. I spent most of the day on the verge of tears because 1. my neck hurt really, really badly, and 2. I was essentially useless after making the trip out to be helpful. I ended up working on a few projects that didn't ultimately happen, like spraypainting blackboard paint on some cardboard for directional signs that never got used. It turned my finger black!

Tuesday was Lissa's final dress fitting up at the same shop where I got my dress, so Laurel and I went up with her and met my mom at the shop. Lissa had no end of trouble getting the dress to be right (the shop ordered a size too big, which came in late, so it had to be drastically altered, and the fabric for the veil didn't come until a week before the wedding so there wasn't time for anyone but the dress shop to make it, and her dress got shuttled between Santa Rosa and the Bay Area at least twice, and she probably had six fittings, and when it was finally done the lady still hadn't done everything she was supposed to do to the dress). I had far less drama with my dress but the last alteration on mine was never done, either, so I am starting to think the whole thing was just a scheme to get more money for the alterations lady. My sister intends to write a scathing review on Yelp, and I am glad I stuck to my guns and insisted on the size that I knew would fit me. We ran a few other errands that day - to the wholesale flower place to look at flower possibilities, to Costco and Trader Joe's and BevMo to price alcohol, and we helped my mom pick out carpet. My neck felt a little better that day, but not a whole lot. I pulled a list of "to be done" out of Lissa's head in the car on the way back down to the Bay Area and when we got back I organized it into "Stuff to buy" "Errands to run" and "Projects to finish" and I think it ended up being helpful for them.

Wednesday I tagged along on more errands and then I met Leah at her work to pick up a key to her house. Then my friend the Irish German picked me up at a cafe, we had some tasty Pakistani food, and stopped at Berkeley Bowl (Pilgrimage!), and then we went back to his house in Oakland to relax for a while before we retrieved Dan at the airport. The Irish German co-owns his house with College Boyfriend, so I got a little update on College Boyfriend's life (currently: off-again with his 10 year, on/off again gf) and got to hear all about how fertile his brothers are (he has one niece, another on the way, and his younger brother's wife just found out she's having twins). He had retired to his room by the time we returned from the airport, and everyone was just exhausted so we didn't stay up late or anything, and I got to sleep in a Real Bed for the first time in nearly a week and it was so, so nice. I heart the Irish German.

Thursday, we made a tasty breakfast for our pal who let us sleep in his bed, and picked some veggies in his garden, and he drove us all over the place, meeting with Lissa and Curtis at the Oakland Flower Market for them to buy flowers and me to take them and deposit them in Leah and Simon's basement, and then we had to go meet them again to get the other stuff they needed to give me (cooler, bowls for the event on Friday) and for Curtis to pick out the right orchid plant that would have enough flowers on it for the groomsmen's bouts. We got back to the Irish German's place pretty frazzled, so we relaxed for a while and logistics for Thursday night were worked out (a last-minute bachelor and bachelorette event came together, so Dan had to take our newly-acquired rental car down to the South Bay and went out to see Batman and play games at Dave and Buster's with the boys, and I took BART over to the city, met up with my sisters and a couple of other ladies, and we watched Mamma Mia and then went out to an Irish Pub, and then I took the bus all the way across the city to Scarlett's house where Dan and I stayed that night).

Friday we got up and going much later than I had hoped and it took us over an hour to get through the city and across the Bay. Luckily, we'd done our planning in advance so we knew exactly what we needed to buy at Costco and at Berkeley Bowl. And we lugged our groceries to Leah and Simon's who graciously agreed to let us use their kitchen to cook the rehearsal dinner that Dan and I hosted that night for the happy couple. We made a green salad with veggies from the Irish German's garden, and black bean/corn salad, and shrimp kabobs, and turkey burgers, and bought everything to go with, plus made some guacamole for the chips and salsa, and a great big apple pie and cookies from Costco. We hauled all the food up to the park in nasty traffic, but luckily the guests weren't there yet since everyone else had to deal with the same traffic. We used a new portable grill that L&C got as a wedding gift, since the charcoal in the existing park grill didn't work out so well (though it eventually caught after all the food was cooked and people used it to warm their hands; it gets cool up there once the sun goes down!) and successfully fed 26 guests (plus leftovers for Leah and Simon) for about $120. Not too shabby!

After the party was over, a big group went over to decorate the wedding afterparty venue but Dan and I went back to Leah and Simon's to finish the handmade guestbook, relax and watch Flash Gordon (Dan) and put together all the personal flowers (me). I made 1 bridal bouquet, 4 bridesmaid bouquets, 2 flower girl nosegays, 5 groomsmen bouts, 3 other bouts (2 dads and Dan), and six corsages in about 3 and a half hours (I took a shower break) and got to bed around 1:30 AM. It was a long week, and I haven't even written about the wedding yet.

Photos courtesy Laurel and someone using Lissa's camera (not sure who!)

The big post about baking (for Monkey)

So I asked a couple of weeks ago for suggestions on food-related topics. Monkey wanted a post about Baking 101. So, with the help of the internets and the Joy of Cooking, I am here to dispel the myths and impart the wisdom I've gained in baking for the last, oh, 23 years.

Cookies

There are so many different kinds of cookies (drop, rolled/shaped, bar, etc.) that it's difficult to write something about cookies in general, but I will do my best. Cookies are usually made with shortening (butter, margarine, etc.), sugar, eggs, the dry ingredients (flour, baking soda/powder, salt), and other stuff to make them taste good (chocolate, chocolate chips, vanilla, oatmeal, raisins, dried cranberries, nuts, etc.) Cookies bake differently depending on the type (on a cookie sheet as individual items vs. cooked in a pan for bar-type), but usually take somewhere between 5-10 minutes per batch. The oven is preheated and cookies are usually baked on a greased cookie sheet (though some varieties don't require greasing, like Mexican Wedding Cookies). When the cookies are done, it's usually a good idea to remove them from the sheet or pan (to help prevent overcooking), unless you're baking a bar cookie recipe that requires a second step, like the addition of melted chocolate and nuts over a plain bar cookie, or adding the lemon part to a lemon bar.

If you're making shaped/rolled cookies, it's usually a good idea to chill the dough before rolling/shaping to make it easier to work with. If you're making drop cookies, there's usually no need (unless the dough is really sticky). Bar cookies tend to have thicker dough and are pressed by hand into a pan before baking.

I've never really tried to make lower-fat cookies, though sometimes I use more oatmeal and less white flour if I'm making a cookie recipe with oatmeal. The few experiments I've done with substituting whole wheat flour for white haven't turned out tasting especially good, so I figure if I'm going to be eating cookies they might as well be yummy. Also, I tend to use a mixture of white and brown sugar or just brown regardless of the type of sugar called for in a recipe (unless it's a recipe where the color of the final cookie needs to be really light) - I find brown sugar makes cookies more flavorful and more chewy. I almost always use unsalted butter to make cookies and have had better luck with melted baker's chocolate than cocoa powder when making chocolate cookies. To melt baker's chocolate, use a double boiler or melt it in a saucepan over another saucepan that has hot water in it, and add a little bit of shortening to help it melt evenly. Heat until melted but do not overheat.

Process of cookie making: Cream together sugar and shortening/butter in a large bowl. (I always do this by hand) Add eggs and flavoring (vanilla, almond extract, etc.). Add melted chocolate if you are using it. Use a pastry blender to sift dry ingredients together in a smaller bowl, then add to wet ingredients slowly until mixed in. Add mix-ins (chocolate chips, oatmeal, dried cranberries, raisins (I never use raisins in cookies, I hate the way baked raisins taste), nuts, etc.). I also tend to add spices like cinnamon or allspice, depending on the recipe.

I think if you are not used to the process of making cookies, you should follow the recipe until you get more comfortable with the process and can make substitutions or additions. I've been making cookies for a really long time so I usually feel comfortable doing this.

Pies/crisps

I wrote about pie crust here, but the other awesome thing to do with fruit to turn it into a dessert is to make a crisp/crumble/buckle/brown betty etc. Fruit crisp is super easy and far more healthy than baking the same fruit inside a pastry shell. For a basic crisp, you need brown sugar, some butter (a few tablespoons), some oatmeal, some spices (cinnamon, nutmeg, allspice, cloves, ginger, whatever), and a little bit of flour. I always eyeball the proportions and mix the butter into the other ingredients with my hands so I know it's well-mixed. Prepare fruit (chop into pieces, peel, etc., whatever you need to do to prep it) and add a little bit of sugar to the fruit unless it's really sweet. If it's super-sweet, you can add lemon juice to it. Put it in a pie pan or an 8x8 baking dish and sprinkle the crisp topping, then pop it in the oven (at 350 or so) until it smells done and the juices are running out of the fruit.

Muffins/quickbreads

According to Joy of Cooking, muffins and quickbreads are the same thing, just cooked in differently-shaped pans (so essentially, any quickbread recipe can be used to make muffins and vice versa). Quickbreads are so named because they are cooked with baking powder and soda rather than yeast, so they take far less time to bake. I don't bake a lot of muffins from scratch but I have made quite a few quickbreads over the years (favorites include: a family recipe for cranberry orange bread which I have modified at times to be pomegranate orange bread, zucchini bread, corn bread, and pumpkin-chocolate chip bread).

The basic process for a muffin or quickbread is to combine the wet ingredients very well (eggs, butter/oil, honey/brown sugar, the main liquid (milk, yogurt, sour cream, fruit juice, etc.), and combine the dry ingredients very well with a pastry blender or whisk to get them kind of fluffed up (flour, salt, baking powder and/or soda), then gently fold the dry into the wet until just moistened and immediately pour into greased/papered muffin tins or loaf pan. As with pie crust, the more you mix, the tougher it will be. Use a butter knife or toothpick in the center of the loaf to check for doneness; muffins are usually done when they've risen a bit and the tops are starting to brown.

And now, for Monkey's questions. She asked:

"Specifically-what's the difference btween regular unsweetened cocoa powder and dutch processed? Do I need to use baking powder AND baking soda in a muffin recipe? What's the difference between cake flour, regular all purpose and whole wheat? I cook my regular muffins with whole wheat and I'm happy enough with that but I'm curious as to the differences. "

Cocoa powder: According to wikipedia, cocoa powder comes in two varieties: regular or natural (the kind you usually see in a store) is more reddish than the traditional "chocolate" color, and relatively low in pH, which can cause a bitter/acidic taste; and Dutch processed, which has been treated to neutralize some of the acidity and so is milder in taste and more chocolate-colored. The cocoa powder I use at home is a Dutch processed special dark flavor made by Hersheys, though I like regular cocoa powder for some things as well.

Baking powder/soda (info from Joy of Cooking):

Baking soda is used when there is enough acid in a recipe to neutralize the alkaline in the soda, which causes the release of carbon dioxide (this process is called chemical leavening). The carbon dioxide pushes against the batter, which causes it to expand while it bakes. A recipe needs enough acid to cause the reaction to happen - soured milk of some sort (yogurt, sour cream, etc.), molasses, chocolate, honey, citrus juice. If there isnt enough acid, you have to use a combination of baking soda and baking powder. When using baking soda in a recipe, the carbon dioxide reaction starts almost immediately so you have to bake the batter asap or it won't rise enough in the oven.

Baking powder is a combination of baking soda and a liquid- and heat-responsive acid salt like cream of tartar. You can make your own baking powder at home by combining 1/4 tsp baking soda, 1/2 tsp cream of tartar, and 1/4 tsp cornstarch (this makes 1 tsp single-acting baking powder). Most baking powder sold in stores is double-acting, meaning it has an acid that doesn't react until the batter reaches a certain temperature (usually 140 F), which causes additional rise during the later stages of baking and makes a final product lighter/taller.

So the answer to your question is, it depends. Does your muffin recipe use one of the liquid acids above? If not, you probably need to use both to get a nicely-risen muffin.

Flour:

This wikipedia entry is really good, but basically, whole-wheat flour is higher in gluten and protein because it contains the whole grain, all-purpose flour is a mid-grade with a medium amount of gluten and protein, and cake flour has low gluten to produce a lighter texture. Generally, if you're substituting whole wheat for all-purpose in a recipe it's best not to go above a 1/3 wheat 2/3 all-purpose ratio or you usually end up with something that is much tougher and chewier, though whole wheat flour is generally healthier than all-purpose (we get the all-purpose flour that has not been bleached).

In terms of making muffins/quickbreads more healthy, I have had luck substituting part whole wheat flour for the white in a recipe (generally 1/3 wheat to 2/3 white, any more than that and you run into the texture/hockey puck issue) and sometimes have used more fruit/vegetable (applesauce, zucchini, carrot, pumpkin) in lieu of some of the oil or shortening. Monkey also writes in her comment (in reference to her healthy muffin recipe):

"I'm thinking of making my muffins, but using silken tofu in place of the eggs, and adding unsweetened cocoa powder as well. This probably means I'll have to up the splenda-I'll be doing a batter taste test to get a sense of whether it's likely to be edible."

I think the eggs in a recipe are generally used to help bind ingredients together, and I've never baked with tofu so I can't tell you if it will serve the same purpose - silken tofu may make the batter more runny than you want, depending on how much you use. I've also never baked with splenda, so I can't help you there. I think it will definitely require some experiementation!

Cakes

I only started baking cakes from scratch about 10 years ago (and don't do it frequently) so I haven't spent as much time figuring out tips/tricks. I can say that I have never used cake flour in a cake recipe and my cakes have always turned out tasty, but maybe I'm missing out. My usual MO for cake-baking is to find a likely-looking recipe or 4 on AllRecipes.com and figure out the similarities/differences between them, then decide which one I'm going to use and make substitutions if I feel like it. I've had good luck plugging ingredient names into their search engine and finding exactly what I'm looking for (see here, where I made a chocolate zucchini rum cake). Baking is all about chemistry and, in my opinion, it's far easier to have something come out well if you use a recipe that you know has worked for someone.

One thing that's different about cakes than some other baked goods is that you want all your ingredients to be as close to room temperature as possible when you mix them. That means leaving the eggs and butter out of the fridge for a little while, or nuke them for a few seconds if they are cold. Also, I have better luck using a mixer (hand or stand) to mix a cake batter than if I do it by hand (unless I'm making the cake from a mix, in which case it makes no difference). Cake recipes often call for greased and floured pans, but I usually grease/sugar or grease/sugar/cocoa powder (for chocolate cakes) them, if I'm not using parchment paper (which I need to do more of, it makes life easier!) - using the grease/sugar method works just as well, and you don't have flour on the outside of your cake when you take it out.

Frosting cakes:

While I tend to use a cake recipe any time I'm baking one, I usually concoct my own frosting. I've got a basic buttercream recipe that my mom taught me as a wee youngster, and I just tend to tweak that to my own devices, depending on what kind of cake I've made. The difference between frosting and icing is that frosting has butter/shortening and icing does not. Icing is generally powdered sugar and a liquid, such as milk or alcohol, and if poured over a warm cake will soak in a bit, or if poured over a cool cake will harden and look cool. (You can also make chocolate icing with melted baking chocolate, powdered sugar, milk, and a bit of almond extract, but you have to heat it up). Anyway, basic buttercream frosting goes like this (all amounts are estimated, as I don't measure anything):

1 stick unsalted butter
2 cups powdered sugar
1/4-1/2 cup milk (we only use nonfat milk at home)
2 tsp vanilla

To softened butter in a mixing bowl, add about a cup of powdered sugar and some milk and vanilla and beat with a hand mixer. Keep mixing, adding powdered sugar, and adding milk until it's the consistency you want. Add a pinch of salt if it's too sweet. You can add cocoa powder (maybe 1/4-1/3 cup) to make chocolate frosting. You can reduce some of the butter and substitute cream cheese or neufchatel cheese for cream cheese frosting. You can flavor with rum, bourbon, or other tasty spirit in place of the vanilla. The world is your oyster! This recipe frosts a 9x13 or layered 8 inch round cake (but won't make enough for filling between the layers; I tend to use mashed strawberries or raspberries between cake layers or maybe some instant pudding) and leaves a little left over for decorating if you want to do that. Don't frost a warm cake, and if you're working in a warm room, refrigerate the frosting for a little while before you frost the cake, and cover it and refrigerate it after frosting so it won't melt and separate. And also, a cake will look prettier if you frost it with a really light layer called a crumb coat, let that set in the fridge for a while, and then frost it again with a heavier layer - that way, the crumbs are all sealed in so it's easier to keep the frosting looking nice and smooth.

My favorite cake I ever made was a butterfly-shaped cake for my old pal and roommate Bequi. I don't actually remember what kind of cake it was, but it was frosted with basic buttercream and I used raspberries, blackberries, strawberries, blueberries, gooseberries (green), and a variety of edible flowers to decorate it. It was so pretty!

OK, I've kind of run out of steam here - and I never wrote anything about cheesecake. Perhaps next week if I have any time between running errands as my sister's Bridal Slave (hee). If you have questions about anything I've written, or anything else baking-related, please leave them in the comments!

Fallback

Everybody has them, even people who love cooking. Even people who love to toil for hours in the kitchen. Even people who like variety in their diets, who won't admit it even if you caught them in the act.

Everybody has them. Those easy meals. The ones you put together at the last minute with stuff you always have on hand, because they are quick, filling, and don't require any thought whatsoever.

In our house, we have a few different meals like this. Stirfry. Pasta and sauce with ground turkey. Burritos. These are the worker bee meals, the ones that neither of us will ever sigh over in contentment or triumph, but they take very little time and effort and we're both full afterward. We don't resort to these meals especially often these days, particularly because Dan's only taking one class (and working) so it's not like last semester where he was out of the house from 8 am to 7 pm or 9 pm every day. Nope, so far this summer we've done a lot of experimenting, a lot of trying out of new ideas, a lot of exploring our culinary ranges. However, there's something to be said for these go-to meals, the unsung heroes of those of us that can't afford to (or don't want to) eat out.

Here are two versions of burritos. Version one is how I make them, and version two is how Dan makes them. Both versions are good (but mine are better, haha). Each takes little time, effort, and preparation, each can be made with ingredients we pretty much always have on hand, and each will fill your belly.

MLE's Burritos

1 can refried beans (black, with jalapenos, whatever, as long as there's no lard in 'em), heated in a pan on the stove (add a little water to help smooth them out)
1/2 pound ground turkey, browned and seasoned with whatever sounds tasty (chili powder, garlic, etc.)
lettuce
red or green bell pepper
yellow onion
tomato (if in season)
salsa
whole wheat tortillas
sharp cheddar or pepper jack cheese

Heat beans in pan on stove. Brown ground turkey, drain liquid and season. Heat whole wheat tortilla in frying pan, turning once and sprinkling with sharp cheddar cheese. Remove tortilla from heat to plate, and add a spoonfull of beans, some turkey, lettuce, bell pepper, onion, tomato, and a generous dollop of salsa. Fold up sides and roll up. Eat.

Dan's Burritos

1 can refried beans (see above)
1/2 pound ground turkey
1-2 yukon gold potatoes, chopped into small cubes
1/2 green or red bell pepper, chopped
1/2 yellow onion, chopped
salsa
1 can chicken green chili (optional)
Serve with mexican rice (white rice cooked and 1/2 can of tomatoes with jalapenos mixed in) (optional)

Brown turkey in small frying pan, drain. Sautee potatoes, bell pepper, and onion in medium frying pan until nearly cooked; add turkey and refried beans. Stir. Season with chili powder, cumin, garlic, and sometimes cinnamon (I know, but it's tasty!). Add generous amount of salsa. Microwave 2 whole wheat tortillas for a few seconds to soften. When bean mixture is heated through, sprinkle with sharp cheddar cheese. Scoop generous helping into tortilla, roll up, and top burrito with some green chili (it's a staple around these parts, usually made with pork, but we can get a chicken kind at the store too). Add torn lettuce leaf to your wife's burrito before rolling because she is an infidel and likes lettuce in her burritoes.

Both versions will end up with leftover filling if you are serving 2 people.

Fantasy weekend

Dan and I decided to try out some of our wedding gifts this weekend, and thought what better way to combine two things we wanted to do, camping and hiking, than with a trip to Pike's Peak.

Pike's Peak is perhaps Colorado's most famous 14-er (aka 14,000 foot high plus mountain). It's where Katherine Lee Bates penned "America the Beautiful" in 1893, it overlooks Stepford Springs (home to the Airforce Academy and Focus on the Family, amongst other treasures), and there are several ways you can ascend the mountain. You can take a cog railway to the top; you can drive up Pike's Peak highway ($10 a person, or $35/vehicle); you can start at the bottom and hike all the way up to the very top. Back before I moved here, Dan and I used a 30-year-old book about hiking 14ers in Colorado to try to hike to the top of Pike's Peak during one of my visits with no success - I guess after 30 years, the trail the book described was no longer there. We've talked for years about getting back to Pike's and conquering the beastly mountain, but had yet to make it.

On Friday, we talked about going camping, and if so, where might we go. We pulled out the updated version of the 14er book (a gift from Dan's parents) and saw that there was a campground to which one could hike, partway up Pike's Peak. The campground has dinner and breakfast available for purchase, and free water. And so we decided to give it a try. We'd pack lightly, only bringing our sleeping bags, pads, a tent, a little bit of food for the hikes, our camelback bladders (our backpacks are both designed to take water bladders), and a change of clothing. On Saturday morning we arose, made whole wheat pancakes for breakfast, and packed our backpacks, managing to fit everything and have both loads be manageable for hiking. The book described two different approaches to the campground on Pike's, one shorter and less of a climb than the other, which required parking at a trailhead partway up the Pike's Peak highway. Because of my leg, and because we'd be carrying everything on our backs for the hiking portion of the adventure, we didn't count on being able to summit, but decided that just trying it out would be fun. Saturday would be a 4.5 mile relatively flat hike to the campground, we'd get up early on Sunday, and hike up as far as my leg would allow, then all the way back down to the car.

Sounds like a great adventure, right?

Well...

I want to write that everything went as planned, that we drove down to Stepford and up to Pike's Peak highway and that they let us through without paying because we weren't driving to the top and that we hiked to the campground, had dinner and met some cool people doing the same adventure, woke up early on Sunday, and summited the peak before noon, then hiked all the way back down to the car. I want to write that. But I can't because it isn't what really happened.

This is what happened.

I was totally exhausted because of an early (for a weekend) morning due to some jerkiness by Loki, and so after breakfast I wasn't up for leaving yet, but ended up taking an hour-long nap. Then, we packed everything up and went to the grocery store, bought some sandwiches for the car ride down, and sweltered in the 100 degree weather. Our car doesn't have A/C, which isn't a big deal most of the time, but when you're riding in it for hours it can get a bit wearing. Anyhow, we made it down to the springs and followed the directions in the book to Pike's Peak highway, and got to where they make you pay to keep going. "Going up to the top?" the lady asked. "No, actually," we told her, and outlined our plan for driving to the trailhead and hiking to the camp and hiking to the summit tomorrow. "Oh, you can't do that," the lady told us. "First, you can't park overnight at the trailhead. Second, that campground is probably already full, because tomorrow is the Pike's Peak Hillclimb (roadrace) and the road is closed for that all day event."

Guh. Sometimes, it really sucks to try to do spontaneous things without doing internet research, and it just shows that we really need to get some internet at home. Ugh.

So, it turned out we wasted all that gas and all that time in the hot, hot car and all that excitement about finally camping and hiking a 14er. Because neither of us is familiar with the area, and we weren't prepared to camp anywhere that didn't provide food, we decided to just go home. Needless to say, when we got home, we were pretty bummed. We had a good dinner, and we played gin, and I briefly talked to Simon who was having fun at the BlogHer party, but mostly we were both just sad.

Sunday we decided we could at least go hiking, and because it's been so freaking hot here I was hoping that getting out of town would give us a slight relief from the heat. Seriously, it hasn't cooled down below 80 degrees at night in the past several days and we don't have A/C in the house, either, so my quality of sleep has gotten pretty bad. We thought hiking up in Boulder behind NCAR (the National Center for Atmospheric Research) might be a good plan. There are quite a few different trails to explore of all different levels of difficulty. Alas, though the idea was a good one, we took a wrong turn somewhere and ended up doing a far less interesting hike than planned - and I must be fighting something off, because I ran out of energy really quickly, so we only got about 2 hours of hiking in. And the car was an oven when we got back. We stopped at Target on the way home where I attempted to find a cheap one-piece bathing suit for lap swimming (no luck) and we looked for a swamp cooler (no luck). But I did find what I was looking for in Cross Dress for Less in the same shopping center - a black racerback swimsuit for 8 bucks. I can't wait to go swimming on Tuesday.

Less than a week left before I leave for California. My sister's wedding purse is in progress, I have all kinds of lists to make, and more than anything I am looking forward to some Bay Area summer fog. Because 100 degrees during the day and 80+ at night? It's for the birds, man.

Heartbreaker

Between when my relationship with College Boyfriend ended and when I met Dan was a span of about 18 months during which time I actually, like, went on dates with people for the first time ever. In the fall of 2000 I met a guy on BART who made me laugh, and who pestered me for my phone number. Thinking nothing of it, I gave it to him. He called me a day or two later and pestered me until I agreed to hang out with him. Thus began my brief thing (I hesitate to call it a relationship; I considered the situation quite casual) with the Chef.

I call him the Chef because he was a professional chef. He had worked in all kinds of restaurants and loved the inventive, creative side of cooking. One of the most fun things we ever did was go to the grocery store one evening. He stood in the produce area, stock still, for at least five minutes, and then began picking out items to turn into a fabulous feast. That night I learned how to peel/devein shrimp, how to make rice noodles into those fun puffy worms, and I watched him make a caesar salad dressing from scratch (he used some citrus in addition to the usual ingredients). Unfortunately, the good times were few and far between, and while I thought the arrangement was more of a casual dating thing, it turned out he was in love with me. He was also five years older, had had drug and alcohol issues in the past, and he wasn't smart. At all. So eventually I broke it off with him (actually, it was the day before Valentine's Day and he tried to give me the gift he'd bought anyway and I didn't let him and I still feel bad about breaking up with him at that time but I was really over the whole situation and I was only 21 years old for eff's sake). I maintain that the only good things to come out of the deal was that I learned how to toss things in a frying pan one-handed (I rarely use a spatula for cooking tossable food in a pan), I learned how to make salad dressing from scratch (you drizzle the oil into the vinegar/citrus/etc really slowly and whisk the whole time), and I learned how to play competitive Scrabble - all three of which have served me over the years since I broke it off with him.

During part of the time we dated and for a while afterward, the Chef worked at a Caribbean restaurant in the Piedmont area of Oakland. Sometimes I'd go there while he was working and I never had to pay for my meal - and everything he sent me from the kitchen was delicious (it's still the best bread pudding I've ever had, for example). Many of the things I ate at this restaurant were foods I tried for the first time ever - jerk chicken and salmon, jalapeno corn bread, and mango salsa. One of my favorite things was a ceviche - I don't even remember what was in it, only that it was really good. And so last night when Dan made a mango-shrimp ceviche for dinner I thought of the Chef and tipped my proverbial hat to his cooking skills. The man I married may not be a professional chef, and I may have passed on a thing or two I learned from the pro I dated briefly, but he sure can cook. This is the recipe he threw together.

Mango-Shrimp Ceviche (makes about 2.5 or 3 cups)

Approximately 20 51-60 count shrimp, thawed, peeled, and deveined
One small mango, peeled, flesh cut into very small chunks (we used the kind that is yellow and a bit smaller, not the kind that starts green and turns red/pink)
A handful of cilantro, chopped fine
1/4 medium size red onion, chopped fine
1/4 red bell pepper, chopped fine
2 cloves garlic, chopped fine
Juice of 5 limes (I think it worked out to be about 1/2 cup lime juice)
A few splashes of apple cider vinegar
1/2 tsp ground cumin
1/2 tsp dried oregano
1/2 tsp chipotle chili powder
Salt and pepper to taste (don't taste it while the shrimp is still raw though)

Chop shrimp into pieces (they don't all have to be the same size) and mix with all other ingredients. Let refrigerate for a couple of hours until the flesh of the shrimp has become opaque and pinkish. EAT.

Dan served this with warm corn tortillas, coconut rice (rice made with leftover coconut milk from the thai curry we had the other night), refried black beans, and a simple slaw of napa cabbage and carrots. So we kind of ate it like soft tacos. SO GOOD. mmm. It could also be used as a dip for tortilla chips.

Hungry

Yesterday, I decided to exercise twice despite the two hour bike ride on Sunday. I hamstered for a while on the elliptical trainer at lunchtime, and after work I went to my normal weights class. But it wasn't the regular instructor, and the substitue is someone known at my gym for teaching really difficult classes. Yesterday was no exception; there was some stuff I couldn't do because of my leg (the 1-10-1 jumping jacks/pushups pyramid was done all on my left leg) and a lot of stuff that was really, really hard. I was quite knackered after the workout was over and called OF while I walked home, and didn't realize until I'd been home about 10 minutes and hung up the phone with her exactly how spacey and out-of-it I really was. Then I kind of fell over. Then I ate a handful of walnut pieces and some turkey, flopped on the couch, and asked Dan if he could get me some juice, because hoo boy that was some low blood sugar. Last night before bed, Dan got this worried look on his face and confronted me about the incident, and I reassured him that I'd eaten enough food (I had! just should have eaten sooner after that second workout).

Today during the breathing part of my yoga class, the instrutor (as always) said something about focusing on the reasons you come to your mat, giving thanks for those intentions, and I decided to give thanks for the ability to do yoga again. I am really, really sore from all the crazy pushups and other stuff I did yesterday, but I was still able to do most of the yoga poses and flow from one to the next without too much difficulty. I have plans to go swimming for the first time in ages after work at a local pool. But I didn't count on the hunger. Today I brought with me string cheese, an orange, some baby carrots and grape tomatoes, and some leftover black bean/corn salad. It wsn't enough. I am really, really hungry now, and in a few minutes it'll be time to go home. If I eat right when I get home, I'll have a lead belly while I'm trying to swim. So I'm not sure what I'll do. I burned a lot of calories the past few days, because my leg is finally up for extended exercise (and I'm sure swimming will be good for it, too), and I *want* to be burning calories. But I also don't want another low-blood-sugar incident, so I'm not sure what to do.

This black bean and corn salad is the only good thing to come out of my first full-time job in Colorado (meaning, not a temp job) - I worked at the state Medicaid agency and they paid me to do things like sort/count paper clips and hanging file tabs. I'm not even kidding. It was the worst working environment I'd ever been in (even worse than the publishing company in the Bay Area with the misogynistic boss who only hired women he thought would be subservient) and morale was terribly low for the whole five months I worked there. But one time, there was a potluck, and a lady who worked there brought this black bean/corn salad. And it was SO GOOD. I made it last week to go with a meal of turkey brats and grilled zucchini/asparagus.

Black bean/corn salad (scaled down to serve 2 with some leftovers)

1 14.5 oz can black beans, rinsed and drained
1 small can (9 oz?) corn (or you could use a cup of fresh off the cob or frozen), drained
1/3 chopped red bell pepper
1/3 chopped medium size red onion
handful chopped cilantro
1 tsp ground cumin
1 tsp ground coriander
1 tsp chili powder
juice of 1/2 lime
1 tsp olive oil
few dashes rice wine vinegar
optional: 1/2 finely diced jalapeno

Mix everything up in a bowl and let it sit for an hour or so in the fridge to let the flavors meld together. Eat. SO GOOD.

Underpants circa 1982

Money I spent on a bike helmet, bike lock, swim goggles, groceries, sandals, new undies and a new skirt this weekend: Far, far too much

Thing I said that made Dan laugh: "Now that I have a bike helmet, I can go swimming!"

Favorite undies I bought: look like something Lisa Frank might have designed, with rainbows, clouds, hearts and stars in early '80s colors. I am wearing them today. $1.99 at Ross!

Bike ride we took yesterday: 2 hours, probably went about 10 miles

Last time I rode a bike anywhere except atop the old city wall in Xi'an: 1999

Panic attacks I almost had riding over train tracks because it reminded me of my bike accident back in 1999: 2

Cost to swim (or at least, play in the water) at Confluence Park: Free, though no lifeguard is on duty, and we saw about 100 people and dogs of all ages enjoying the free way to cool off

Cost to ride a "gondola" poled by a barefoot college student down part of Cherry Creek toward Confluence Park: No idea, and the views aren't exactly what I would consider romantic, though the ride probably smells better than Venice.

Loads of laundry, washed: 5

Loads of laundry, hung dry/dried in dryer: 4/1 (I won't hang towels dry, because scratchy towels suck)

Best meal cooked: Thai green curry stir-fried veggies over wide rice noodles

We didn't use a recipe and just sort of threw it together quickly because we were really hungry, but here's the gist of it.

Thai green curry with stir-fried veggies (serves 2 really big servings, or maybe 3 regular-sized ones)

Chop up any or all of the following veggies:
1 cup mushrooms
2 large carrots (bias-cut)
2 celery stalks (bias-cut)
1/3 red bell pepper
3-4 leaves napa cabbage, sliced thinly
1 baby bok choy, slice each leaf in half lengthwise

We could have added any number of other vegetables but this is what we had around.

Compose a green curry using 1/2 can coconut milk plus equivalent amount of water, some thai green curry paste, and some lime juice in a pot. Let it simmer while you cook the veggies.

Follow package directions for rice noodles. Ours said to pour hot water over noodles and let them sit for 5-8 minutes, so that's what we did. They were a little chewy, particularly since some of them stuck together, so next time we will stir them a bit while they soak.

Mash up 1/2 block of firm tofu with a fork so it's in little pieces, and season with whatever sounds good. I think Dan used the juice from half a lime, some soy sauce, and some singapore seasoning (from Penzeys).

Cook the mushrooms, carrots, celery, and bell pepper in a wok over high heat with a bit of oil, rice vinegar, and some more spices/seasonings. Chop up some cilantro and thai basil and add that. Add the tofu. When veggies are nearly done, add the napa cabbage and baby bok choy so they wilt but don't get too cooked. Add some whole thai basil leaves if you feel like it.

When noodles are ready, drain and add to bowl. Pour 1/2 veggie mixture over each bowl of noodles. Add green curry. Eat with chopsticks and spoon to get all that tasty green curry goodness.

Food, society, and culture: musings, part 1

The other night, we went over to Julie and Steve's for dinner. The meal was simple, yet delicious, with fresh, healthy ingredients. I helped Julie cook and listened to her latest life update while Dan and Steve chatted in the other room, and when it was all finished (the pasta, the sauce with fresh veggies and lean ground turkey, the garlic bread and the salad), the four of us sat down to enjoy the meal together. This is something I love, to make food with friends and to eat the food together while we enjoy one another's company and nourish our bodies at the same time. Cooking and eating with a group of people is one of my very favorite things to do, whether it's midnight sushi with Leah and Simon, fondue with Sara and Ron, or Julie's latke party - the sharing of food with friends is wonderful.

I find it fascinating how different cultures view food, and the role that food plays in social gatherings around the world. The act of preparing food and/or eating with other people is so intrinsic to the way Americans relate to one another on a social level. Think about it - going out to lunch with coworkers, or attending a work-related social function. Dating. Making food for a significant other, or a child, or an ailing parent or friend. Funeral-baked meats/casseroles. Wedding cake. So many times when it's so important - you share this food with me, therefore we have a common bond. We celebrate our holidays with food, dishes only associated with certain holidays and so become celebratory in themselves - in my family, lasagna and enchiladas are Christmas treats, just as much as Christmas cookies. Barbecue for the fourth of July. Ham for Easter. Thanksgiving is pretty much a holiday solely focused on food - the celebration IS the meal, and we have special foods to commemorate it - the turkey, the stuffing, the cranberry sauce, foods that many people only eat once a year. Food is so important to Americans on so many levels - and not just food, but abundance of food. It's hard to view food as what it really is in our society, fuel for our bodies, when so much of our culture focuses on food as sensual pleasure, food as societal bond, food as love.

As I've been writing out these recipes for the first bit of this month, I've thought each and every time about that particular food, and who I have eaten it with. Particular foods remind me of particular events, and particular people - food associations, I guess you could say. I've also thought a lot about which foods I should write about - should they be the ones I like best? The ones that are easiest to make? The dishes most people would be interested in trying to make themselves? It's a difficult thing to decide, a difficult balance to tread. If anyone out there is reading this and has suggestions, please, by all means share!

There are so many ways to think about food, especially when you're me and you're trying to fit into a bridesmaid dress in a couple of weeks and your leg prevents you from losing that winter layer and the heat makes you not want to eat anything but your blood sugar begs to differ and summer in Colorado means so many good things to eat that are difficult at best to get the rest of the year. So I write about salads, about simple dishes, about things that I cook because I enjoy them and things that I cook because they are good for me, and things that I cook because I have always cooked them. There are things that I would like to eat, but don't, things that I restrict from my diet because they are not good for me (white foods, made with processed flour and white sugar, are horrible for keeping my blood sugar stable) but also because they are not good for my waistline. I attended a bridal shower for a work colleague yesterday that took place in a local restaurant. I brought my own lunch and ate it ahead of time, so while everyone else ate sandwiches, soups, and salads, I sipped water, and when everyone else exclaimed over the chocolate cake, I sipped more water. "Couldn't you have had just a little piece of cake?" asked Dan when I mentioned it, but I told him I'd rather save the calories for a little bit of chocolate after dinner, which in the long run is better for me anyway. But I'll tell you, I felt like more of an outsider than ever. Being the only one in the room not eating cake isn't the easiest thing I've ever done, but that's who I am - I'd rather take care of me than fit in with the rest of the group. And I'm sure as hell going to eat cake at my sister's wedding in a few weeks. But only a small piece.

Ik!

I was a rather picky eater as a child. I didn't like flavorful, spicy things, I didn't like mushrooms, I didn't like most vegetables (though grew to love them when prepared differently, the only veggie I can't stand now is brussels sprouts but that's because they taste like feet smell). I guess I was a typical kid in that respect. I don't exactly remember when I started liking more things and trying out new flavors, but I do remember the first time I ate guacamole and really enjoyed it - I was maybe eight or nine, and my mom was trying out a new Mexican-type meal of some sort. Burritos? Anyhow, I really liked the guacamole, and over the years as I grew up we'd sometimes get avocados and make guac as a treat - not something we had very frequently, but something that was thoroughly enjoyed by all when we did have it.

These days, for some reason, the grocery store where we buy produce often has avocados on sale. I've never liked avocados on their own (they taste too fatty to me, but I don't like a lot of fatty-tasting things like macadamia nuts, so maybe it's just a mouthfeel thing), but I loves me some good, freshly-made guacamole. We have it once every three or four weeks, buying the avocados a few days ahead of time to make sure we catch them at the appropriate ripeness. Here's how we make it at Casa Pantalones del Nerd (all amounts, again, are estimates because I don't measure anything).

Guacamole!

2 ripe avocados (will give to the touch but not mushy)
1/4 finely chopped medium red or yellow onion
1/4 finely chopped red bell pepper (can you tell yet that I really like red bell pepper?)
1/2 cup jarred medium heat salsa (we use a kroger brand Chipotle flavor called Salsa Grande)
1 medium tomato, seeded, drained, and diced (if in season, meaning if we have them ripe in our garden)
good handful of cilantro, finely chopped
juice of 1/2 lime
garlic powder and chili powder to taste (maybe 1/2-1 tsp each?)
Salt and pepper to taste
Optional: splash of tequila
And the secret ingredient? Maya-ik hot sauce from Guatemala, a good squirt

Slice avocados lengthwise around pit. Twist and open so that the pit is in only half the fruit. Take a knife and make a quick chopping motion to embed the knife in the pit for easy removal. Score the flesh of the avocado into small pices (make lines lengthwise and widthwise with a paring knife) and use a spoon to scoop fruit out of skin and into bowl. Add onion and bell pepper. We use a chopper kind of like this one inherited from Dan's grandma for our fine chopping needs. Add salsa, tomato, and cilantro. Squeeze lime and add juice. Add seasonings and tequila if you want. Mash it all up with a potato masher like this one. Taste and add seasonings as needed. Because of the salsa, it's not as green as guac from the store, but boy, is it tasty. Serve immediately with tortilla chips (or julienned veggies, if you're feeling saintly) or use on burgers, in burritos, etc. This recipe makes enough for four people to snack on or two people to get sick on.

Summer salads

(For Monkey, because she asked nicely)

See, the thing about living in Denver is that it is hot in the summer. A dry heat, to be sure, but consistently hot. And there's no large body of water around to cool things off at night, so when we don't get afternoon thunderstorms (which we haven't gotten ANY so far this year, WTF Colorado?) it can stay really hot even at night. Our house is old and leaky and we don't have air conditioning, so when it's in the 90s or higher for days on end and not cooling off at night, the last thing we want to do is heat up the kitchen any more than we have to.

So what do we do? We eat a lot of salad. Dinner-sized, delicious salads that are healthy and produce minimal heat to prepare. Here are three dinner salads we make fairly regularly during the summer.

Poached salmon salad with strawberries (makes 2 dinner-size salads)

1/2 pound salmon fillet (we try to buy wild when possible, but this year it's just way too expensive)
assortment of fresh herbs (basil, dill, lemon thyme, what have you), chopped

Poach salmon in a pan over low heat, skin side down, in some water with the herbs on top. You can add citrus juice (lemon, lime), rice vinegar, whatever. When fish is cooked, remove skin, transfer to a plate, and stick in the fridge to cool off.

Meanwhile, compose (in two large eating bowls) a salad of
spinach
green leaf lettuce
cucumbers, sliced and quartered
carrots (we use a vegetable peeler to make carrot peels/curls)
strawberries, chopped
red onion, diced

in whatever quantities sound good. Add some goat cheese if you're feeling feisty. We do. Toss with balsamic vinegrette (Dan makes this from scratch, but I'm sure bottled stuff would be fine).

When fish is cool, split in half and place half atop each salad. Serve with some crusty bread or just eat as-is.

Taco Salad (makes 2 dinner-sized salads)

1/2 pound ground turkey, browned, drained, and cooked in taco seasoning (either made from scratch or a mix) and a little liquid (water?) to make sure meat is coated

Green or red leaf lettuce
red onion, diced
handful of cilantro, chopped
1/2 regular size can of black beans
corn, either from a can or the cob (if using fresh, cut kernals from cob and then steam a few minutes)
chopped red bell pepper
chopped tomato (if in season)

in whatever amounts appeal to you

Toss vegetable ingredients, then top with taco-ised turkey, a few crumbled tortilla chips, and a bit of grated extra sharp cheddar cheese (because I'm going to eat flavorful cheese if I'm going to eat cheese at all). We use a dressing made of half jarred salsa, half ranch.

Chef Salad (again, makes 2 large dinner salads)

Green or red leaf lettuce
Spinach
red onion, diced
red and/or yellow bell pepper, chopped
cucumber, sliced and quartered
carrot, chopped or in peels
sugar snap peas, chopped into small pieces
fresh tomato, chopped (if in season)

in amounts best pleasing to you

Toss together and top with:
cubed extra sharp cheddar cheese (small cubes)
a few slices of lunch meat (we use turkey for me and ham/turkey for Dan), chopped into small pieces
one hardboiled egg for each salad, sliced

Dress with anything that sounds good. I prefer spicy tomato dressing but you can use just about anything.

et voila! Three summer salads, tasty and healthy, that don't require much cooking or heating of the kitchen.

Anyone else have good salad recipes or ideas? I'm going to experiment a bit with salads this summer, so I'll write more about that later.

I don't know what it's called, but I like it.

One of the first cookbooks I ever used was called the Teddy Bear cookbook. Designed specifically for children, it taught the user how to follow a recipe, and how to make simple yet tasty things. When Scarlett would come for visits, we'd often choose to make something out of this cookbook - sometimes teddy bear pancakes, but more frequently apple pizzas.

Because they were pizzas! Covered in apples! What's not to like? A sweet dough, with cinnamon/sugar apples, apple pizzas were the best, man. And really easy to make.

I flashed back to the apple pizzas this weekend when I thought to myself, "I want to make a pie" and realized it would be absolute torture to have to use the oven during the nasty heat. So I tried to think of some other way to combine fruit and crust without needing the oven. We got a bunch of summer fruit at the grocery store, and that evening I looked through the Joy of Cooking at pastry recipes, trying to decide what I could do.

Finally, it hit me. A galette-style dessert, a very rustic pastry with fruit, the dough brought up and around the sides of the fruit in the middle. I could make it in two batches and cook it in the toaster oven, rather than heating up the entire kitchen. And so I made things up as I went along, and we ate my creation for dessert with vanilla ice cream (just a bit). It doesn't have a name, but boy was it tasty.

Summer fruit galette with cornmeal crust

Crust:
3/4 cup all purpose flour
1/2 cup cornmeal (we use the roughly ground stuff)
1/4 cup powdered sugar
1/2 tsp salt
4 tbsp (1/2 stick) butter
4 tsp butter flavored shortening
1/4 c ice water

Mix all dry ingredients, then cut in butter and shortening using pastry blender. Pour ice water over mixture and cut in using the side of a butter knife or rubber spatula until mixture forms ball of dough. Refrigerate for an hour or so.

Filling:
approximately 3-4 cups summer fruit (I used halved and pitted bing cherries, 2 medium size nectarines, and a handful of blackberries)
1 tsp sugar

After dough has cooled for an hour, separate into two balls. Roll out each ball on floured surface to about a 8-9 inch circle and place on cookie sheet (or on toaster oven tray). Put half the fruit mixture in the center of each rolled out pastry and bring the edges up and over the fruit so it is partly covered but exposed in the center. Bake at 375F for 20-25 minutes (I cooked mine separately because I could only fit one at a time and each of mine took 23 minutes) or until crust starts to brown just a bit on the top.

Serve warm with ice cream, whipped cream, or by its lonesome (so tasty!). Makes 4 very large or 6 medium-sized servings.

Lost Bread

Now THAT was the weekend I needed. We pretty much did absolutely nothing and it was absolutely wonderful. The only productive activities were grocery shopping and a liquor store run (for beer, girl beer, and white wine) - it's been really hot until today and both of us felt like having some beer (Mike's Hard Pomegranate Lemonade for me, which doesn't taste like pomegranate but is still pretty good). Other than that, we did whatever we felt like - took long naps, played with a frisbee in the park, painted our fingernails (me) and toenails (both! I totally painted Dan's toenails while we watched Terminator 2. It was fun). I worked on a Seecret Knitting Project that is turning out to be both fun and challenging, and Dan played a lot of chess on the computer.

But mostly, we cooked, ate, and cleaned up after several tasty, tasty meals. There were some successful experiments (a new rustic fruit pastry! Pizza cooked on the barbeque!) and some tried-and-true classics (Spinach, mushroom, and goat cheese omelettes with kiwi/pineapple and turkey bacon; spinach salad with poached salmon and strawberries). And because this is FoodBlop Month, I'm going to write all about it.

But first, a breakfast favorite around the Pantalones Del Nerd household: French Toast. Or, as the French call it, lost bread (pain perdue?). This is something that I've been making since I was a little kid, and while we eat it pretty rarely, when we do it is so, so good. MMMM.

MLE's French Toast (makes 8 pieces) (all amounts are estimated, since I don't actually measure anything)

4 eggs
1/4-1/3 cup milk
2 tsp vanilla

Mix this all up with a fork or whisk until blended. Add
1/2-1 tsp ground cinnamon
1/2 tsp ground nutmeg
1/2 tsp ground cloves
(you can also use ginger or allspice, but I tend to just pick 3 spices and go with it)

Whisk this together quickly to get the spices as well-integrated as you can into the egg mixture, since they will float and coat the early pieces of bread, leaving the later pieces bereft of spiciness.

Dredge 8 pieces of whole wheat bread in egg mixture (I use a wide-rimmed shallow bowl to accomodate the bread, since I like to leave the bread in the batter for a few seconds to give it time to soak up egg) and cook on nonstick skillet or frying pan (add some nonstick spray first, or some butter if you're feeling up to the extra calories). I leave them on each side until well-browned to make sure the egg inside is cooked.

Serve with fruit to top (chopped strawberries, raspberries, etc.) and maple syrup or agave nectar. I generally eat 3 pieces, Dan eats 4, and there's one leftover for a snack later on.

Seven years of assgrabs and pie

So, seven years ago today Dan proposed to me over IM with the letter O, which is why we consider today our anniversary. I was thinking about it in the shower this morning, about all the adventures we've had, the places we've gone (China! Italy! The Grand Canyon!), the hours-long talks over the phone and IM and in our comfy bed, the dancing around the kitchen and the assgrabs and the tears and the hugs and the joy. So much joy.

In honor of the last seven years, I'm going to write about pie. Because why not? I like pie. Dan likes pie. Pie is really, really tasty, despite being a sometimes food (tm Cookie Monster). My love affair with pie goes back to early childhood, when we ate pie at Thanksgiving (pumpkin, always), when we used apples from the neighbor's tree to make apple pie in the fall, when I picked blackberries off the bush way up on the ridge and brought them home to mix with peaches and pour into a crust. I've been baking since I was a little kid (I think I baked my first solo cookies at around age six) and absolutely love to make pie fresh from scratch, going so far as to process a sugar pumpkin for the best pumpkin pie ever.

Pies I have made:

Chocolate chiffon
Cranberry-cherry (made up my own recipe for this)
Pumpkin, both from canned pumpkin and processed sugar pumpkin
Apple
Blackberry Peach
Strawberry Rhubarb
Lime (used regular limes instead of key limes, and it was still quite tasty)
Cherry (from canned, frozen, and fresh cherries)
Peach
Apricot
Sweet potato

I've never made a pecan pie (too tooth-hurtingly sweet for me) or a chess pie or a shoofly pie. I tend to try to make pies that are as healthy as can be (it's still pie, so it's not GOOD for you, but I can certainly make changes to a recipe to up the nutritional value.

And I always make the crust from scratch. Many people shy away from making pie crust, because it can be really, really temperamental. Perhaps I've just made so many that it's not that hard for me, or perhaps I just have good luck with it. But here are my tips for good pie crust.

1. Use a mixture of unsalted butter and butter flavored shortening; you get the best of both worlds. And always keep them as cold as possible (I keep my shortening in the freezer and chop it up into bits before adding it to the flour).

2. Add some spices to the crust, it can really jazz up the flavor. The spices I use vary depending on pie, but I've been known to put in cinnamon, cloves, nutmeg, allspice, and ginger (not all in the same crust of course!)

3. The less you work with the dough, the better. Since Colorado has such a dry climate, I have to use more water in my pie crust recipe than is generally called for, but the secret to a good, flaky dough is to not touch it too much. I sprinkle in water and toss it around with a fork, and when the dough is wet enough I scoop some up in my hands to roll it out, forming into a lump right before I start attacking with the rolling pin.

4. Use flour-sprinkled waxed paper on whatever surface on which you're rolling out the crust. It's much easier to transfer it to the dish or top of the pie if you can just pick it up, flip it over, and peel off the waxed paper, rather than trying to roll it around the rolling pin.

5. Homemade pie crust is nearly impossible to use for making lattice-top pies. If you want the dough to be flaky and tasty, you can't touch it much, which means when you cut lattice strips and start working with them, they will fall apart. The only time I'll ever use storebought pie crust is to make a lattice-top pie.

6. Use a fork to vent holes in the top of a two-crust pie, and always try to make a funky design or spell something that will make Dan (or yourself, or whoever) laugh. This is the secret to a really good pie.

What is your favorite kind of pie?

Because it tastes better if you make it yourself

I have to admit, when it comes to food, cooking, and food preparation I've oftentimes had to consider myself a purist. I tend to do things the old-fashioned way, even when there are gadgets for my convenience; for example, I usually mix cookie dough and cake batter by hand with a wooden spoon even though we have a Kitchenaid stand mixer now. While I'll admit that there are benefits to shortcuts and fancy equipment, sometimes it just doesn't feel right unless you do it the way it's always been done (or unless you make it yourself).

Take hummus, for example. Store-bought hummus is generally OK, but it's a little thick and dry for my taste. Plus, a little container costs like $3-4. Have you ever read the ingredients on hummus? It's a pretty basic foodstuff, and not at all difficult or expensive to make fresh, from scratch, especially if you have a food processor. I like to make hummus in the summer (though I make it all year, I want to eat it more in the summer because it's cold, tasty, full of fiber and protein, and doesn't heat up the kitchen). One of the few meals that I am the one in our house who cooks is falafel with hummus, pita, veggies, and yogurt/cucumber/dill sauce (Dan cooks most dinners, and usually I'll cook things he cooks, and he'll cook things I cook, but we have a few meals each that are specialties).

MLE's tasty, tasty hummus (makes about two cups)

1 can garbanzo beans (also known as chickpeas), drained, reserve some of the liquid (we use the low-salt variety)
4-6 cloves fresh garlic, depending on size and how much you like garlic
1 tbsp tahini (sesame seed butter)
juice of one lemon
1/2 medium tomato
a few dashes crushed red pepper, depending on how spicy you like it
salt & pepper to taste

Combine all ingredients in food processor until blended, using reserved liquid from garbanzo beans to make it the right consistency. I have varied this recipe depending on what we have in the house; you can substitute olive oil for the tahini, and the tomato is optional but I feel it adds a nice sweetness and depth of flavor. I've also put in red bell pepper from time to time.

I use hummus instead of other condiments on sandwiches, in wraps, and as a dip for veggies. It is super healthy and tasty and full of protein that keeps my blood sugar stable.

Midsummer Month's Blopping

I've participated in NaBloPoMo for the past two years, and now it's expanded to be every month (not just November). Each month has a theme, and while I'm not up for trying to write a post every day in July (lack of internets at home makes blopping nigh unpossible on the weekends), I am interested in food. And writing about it. So I'm going to write about food sometimes this month. And you are going to like it.

First up: Thai spring rolls

Our 3-month wedding anniversary was on Sunday, so Dan and I decided to make a nice dinner. We decided to make thai spring rolls (making use of some of the thai basil in the garden), edamame, and wonton skins filled with red bean paste. Luckily, the only things we needed at the grocery store to make this fine meal were shrimp and carrots. We got to use some of our new kitchen equipment (bamboo steamer for the edamame) and, after some major teamwork, had a tasty and relatively healthy celebratory meal.

Thai spring rolls (makes 4) (which is enough for 2 people if you add in some edamame and some wonton skins filled with red bean paste)

4 spring roll wrappers (the big kind, I think they are 9x9 inches?)
2 carrots, shredded
3 large lettuce leaves, shredded
12 leaves thai basil (you can use regular basil or mint, but I like thai basil a lot)
a handful of rice vermicelli
16 51-60 size raw shrimp, defrosted, peeled and deveined
1/4 red bell pepper, julienned thinly

1. Prep the veggies and boil water for rice vermicelli (often sold as rice stick noodles, the really really thin kind)
2. Season shrimp with something that sounds tasty. We used this but you could use garlic or any variety of seasonings.
3. Sautee shrimp with a very small amount of oil in a nonstick pan until cooked, about 2 minutes (toss occasionally). Transfer shrimp to small bowl and refrigerate.
4. Toss handful of rice vermicelli into boiling water. Cook for 2 minutes, then drain and run cold water over the noodles for 30 seconds or so to cool them off.
5. Soak spring roll wrappers one at a time - we have to use a cookie sheet with high sides - maybe this is a jelly roll pan? - to make sure the wrapper fits and can be completely submerged.
6. Pay attention to spring roll wrappers - touch them frequently to see how pliable they are. If you wait too long, they'll fall apart.
7. When each wrapper is at the correct consistency, drain and transfer to a plate. On each wrapper, place some lettuce, carrot, noodles, red bell pepper, 4 cooked shrimp and 3 thai basil leaves. Roll up like a burrito (fold sides in).
8. When all 4 wrappers are filled, you can refrigerate for a while or eat right away.

I also made an impromptu peanut sauce with natural style chunky peanut butter (ingredient: peanuts), some soy sauce and some brown sugar. We drizzled this on the thai spring rolls and it was mighty tasty.

As for the less-than-healthy portion of our dinner, we opened a can of red bean paste, spread some on the middle of four wonton skins that had been in the freezer since God was a boy (so it took forever to defrost them and they were all weird and mushy), topped each with another wonton skin, and fried them until they were cooked, turning occasionally. We don't eat much fried food so wonton skins (either filled with something or alone) are a guilty pleasure. Also, it's fun to put uncooked rice vermicelli in the hot oil because they get all weird and puffy and snakelike in like 2 seconds.

It was a really yummy dinner.